We love our girl talk, but is it hurting our relationships?
Most women are natural born communicators. In other words, we love to talk! We share everything with our close friends and at times, we are reliant on the feedback we receive. This is especially true when it comes to relationships. If your boyfriend surprises you with a lunch date after you've had a difficult meeting, who is the first person to know about it-besides Facebook and Instagram, of course? Your closest friends! On the flip, if he is in a crappy mood, doesn't load the dishwasher or seems distant, who do you reach out to...your closest friends.
This cycle repeats itself everyday. It's become a "thing" that women do...complain about their significant others. Sometimes it seems like we are trying to one up each other, in some backwards competition of who's boyfriend or husband is the worst. We don't hesitate to sling him over the coals if it means we have the best story. Reaching out for support, someone to talk to or help figuring your thoughts out is one thing. Complaining about your man just because it's just what you do is entirely another.
When the first thing you bring up at lunch with your best friend is how you and your partner got in a huge silly fight that morning, you're opening the relationship up for discussion-and do you really want that? For the most part, our friends always want the best for us, and we are able to trust their feedback. But what if someone is just in a pms induced mood and decides to tell you that you shouldn't have forgiven him, or instigates something that she has nothing to do with. It only takes a little bit of drama to start a fire, and sometimes, women who are unhappy in their own relationships subconciously don't want you to be happy either. All of a sudden, you're mad again, but are you even sure why?
Of course there are some relationships that are so rocky that not sharing your troubles with a friend would be dishonest on your part. These are the times when you should reach for your girls and hold them tight. But if your relationship is going along smoothly, with minor bumps in the road here and there, instead of zeroing in on the one thing he's done that week that was wrong, talk about the things he did that made you smile, no matter how seemingly insignificant. Sure, it's not as juicy or dramatic, but how do you feel when you walk away from that kind of conversation? Uplifted, loved, and secure, right?
So yes, hold your friends tight...but hold your relationship tighter.