ProConnect

I'm Embarrassed To Admit This To You...

By

I'm Embarrassed To Admit This To You...
Send vanity on its way and feel confident.
It's important to feel confident about who you are.

I try to hide my dismay and discomfort from my husband who's watching the videos over my shoulder. I announce that I need to change my top for the next round of filming. I run to my closet and pull out a long-sleeved pale grey top that I know will cover my arms. I put it on feeling temporary relief, at least now a part of me I don't want seen will be covered up.

We go outside to shoot the second round. The top looks and feels ridiculous in the summer heat. And then I ask myself, "What's wrong with me, what am I doing?"

I've always been proud of my authentic approach to life and for the self-acceptance I’ve worked so hard through the years to attain. Where did it go? Why am I hiding myself this way, as if no one would notice if I wore long sleeves? Wow, here was a big test for me, challenging my very sense of myself. I’ve got to be who I am, that’s just me.

When my mom offered me a "nose job" when I was 14 I turned it down. When a Hollywood agent told me she would only work with me if I had my nose fixed, I considered it for a day but said no. And now here I am the result of my choices not to alter my appearance. I know if I don’t make peace with myself I will be miserable. I will erase all the work I’ve done to raise my self-esteem as a woman.

I go back to the closet and put the blue top back on. I'm going to show my skin, I can't let myself care if people notice my wrinkles and sags. I see older women around me as beautiful so I can a least extend that same non-judgment to myself. My husband is aware of what I'm going through, he knows me well. He's unfazed by my abrupt change of clothes. I can't pretend to him that I look any different than I do.

So here I am writing this to remind myself what is truly important and also to challenge those of you who judge yourselves too harshly. The Course in Miracles tells us that we are not our bodies and when we identify too much with the body we lose touch with who we truly are; which is spirit. I'm happy now to see the video on my website, to know that whatever people think or say about it (why didn't she cover up that neck!) is not my business. In fact, through this all, I've come to a deeper sense of self-esteem and self-acceptance. You could say I've confronted my vanity and sent it on its way.

Share this with someone you love (or even like a lot)!

Let's make it
FB official
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Virginia Clark

Relationship Coach

My book,  "It's Never Too Late To Marry: How to Have the Man and the Marriage of Your Dreams" is available for instant download. It will teach you the 6 essential steps you need to go from single to married to the right man for you!

Join my email community and recieve my free MP3 "Letting Love In."

Apply for your complimentary "Attract the Love of Your Life Breakthrough Session."

 

Location: Phoenix, AZ
Credentials: CHT
Other Articles/News by Virginia Clark:

The Tipping Point: Why Your Relationship Lost Its Spark

By

Have you been blindsided by a relationship that suddenly lost all its romance? Have you had great physical chemistry with a man that suddenly turned "ho hum" for no reason? Why do relationships that have so much promise fizzle out and lose their spark? There's a common mistake you might be making that will stop a great relationship in ... Read more

The Secret To Finding The Love Of Your Life

By

There's a little known secret that will increase your chances of having a successful relationship; a secret that will help you go from just dating a man to having him turn into the love of your life. It's not often talked about because this secret is not something you'd consider sexy or exciting; in fact it's the exact opposite. But if you ... Read more

30 Fun Ways To Share & Spread The Love This Valentine's Day

By ,

We know you've got the whole "romantic Valentine's Day" thing down pat. But in case you're looking to spread a little more love around, try these 30 ideas for making everyone's love holiday the best yet. Try these tips along, with gal pals, or your partner. We're feeling more festive already!   From ... Read more

See More

Recent Expert Posts
Smooches

She's That Into You: Cracking the Code of Women

Women give off signals telling you how they feel.

Girlfriends

6 Texting Shockers You Must Avoid!

Sending your man a text message sounds easy enough, but get it wrong and it could be the end of you.

Blues

The addiction to "busy"ness: How to live with more intention

Is the daily routine of life getting you down? Find your passion and live a more authentic life!

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

Resources
How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>
HOT STUFF!
FROM OUR PARTNERS