When it comes to picking a lifetime partner and finding Mr. Right, we want a good man . Here are some of the qualities most of us are looking for:
We want a man with a sense of humor; who can make us laugh.
We want a man who treats us like a woman, who’s thoughtful and has manners.
We want a man who’s smart and able to engage us in conversation.
We want a man who’s responsible financially.
All of these qualities are important when it comes to looking for a man to share your life.
Other qualities we be look for are:
We want a man who’s honest and sincere.
We want a man with integrity, who will do what he says.
We want a man who can roll with hard times as well as good.
We want a man who shows up when we need him.
Can you see the difference between the first and second list of qualities? There’s a reason I put them on separate lists. Which list do you think is more important when you consider meeting your ideal partner?
The answer is simple. The first group of qualities are evident in the beginning of a new relationship. They’re apparent in the first few days, weeks and or months of meeting someone. These are all wonderful qualities and they can sweep us up into a new romance. As we experience these qualities in our new man we can’t help but feel that our search is finally over; we’ve met our Mr. Right. But these 4 qualities can be deceiving.
All too often we can be blindsided by a man with these qualities after only a few months of dating. Maybe you’ve experienced this. You fall in love with a man who’s done a good job of wooing you. He’s charming, funny and attentive. He’s financially stable, a good conversationalist and treats you like a lady.
But then something changes; he loses his enthusiasm and grows distant. Before you know it, the relationship that you thought held so much promise is suddenly over, leaving you bewildered and angry.
What happened? Well, you rushed in a little too fast and gave a little too much of yourself before you really knew if he was a good guy. You see the first group of qualities has nothing to do with a man’s character; they only tell you that he’s a “possibility” and a good date.
How do you know he’s Mr. Right?
The qualities you need for a lifelong relationship are only be revealed over time. They’re not discernible in the first weeks or even months of dating. They reveal themselves as the relationship grows, as you face new experiences together.
That’s why the second group of qualities should be your priority. They are infinitely more important than the first.
To avoid heartache and disappointment, you must learn to be patient when choosing a partner. In some rare cases, people meet in marry right away and it works out. But for most of us, it takes really knowing someone first.
Don’t give a man attributes that haven’t been shown to you yet. Instead, enjoy getting to know him so you can truly find out if he’s a good guy.
There's more information on how to recognize your Mr. Right in my book, "It's Never Too Late To Marry: How to Have the Man and the Marriage of Your Dreams." Or sign up HERE for my newsletter full of tips and advice.
This article was originally published at It's Never Too Late to Marry
. Reprinted with permission from the author.