One of the biggest reasons women suffer after abortion is because of the unwritten rule: don't talk.
Women who have abortions do not feel like they should be allowed to grieve the loss of a child there is no evidence of. And after all, you shouldn’t be permitted to grieve over a loss that you have chosen to create. Putting the missing pieces together can be confusing and overwhelming.
Grieving is a necessary process of letting go and receiving closure. Our culture does women a great disfavor when we do not allow them to grieve their abortion losses. The answer seems to be not to talk about “it.”
WRONG. It is in talking, telling your story to someone who understands, that the grief is released and put to rest. Dr. Christiane Northrup, M.D., F.A.C.O.G. states clearly in her newly revised, Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom, "...if every woman who ever had an abortion , or even one-third of them, were willing to speak out about her experience---not in shame but with honesty about where she was then, what she learned, and where she is now---this whole issue would heal a great deal faster."
Unfortunately, there is no place or public venue to grieve the loss of abortion in our culture or to even talk about the subject. No one talks about or crys about their past abortion, except for home alone in the wee hours of the night. Everyone feels alone in the decision. Little do they know their office mate, their sister or even their best friend may be feeling the exact same way.
If this is YOU, find a safe person to talk with about your past abortion. Make sure that person is deserving of hearing the intimate details of your past. This person needs to be someone who won't judge you or invalidate you. Talking is always good even if its' hard.