How VPT Grief Might Impact Your Daily Life - Step Four


How VPT Grief Might Impact Your Daily Life  - Step Four
Understand how to reach a place of closure after your voluntary pregnancy termination

Knowing you are not alone,knowing that feeling a deep loss after abortion is normal and knowing that grief after abortion is greatly misunderstood by those who haven’t walked the journey, are important pieces in reaching a place of closure after your voluntary pregnancy termination.  

Processing points of grief in one’s life are important aspects of being a healthy person.   If grief and loss after your choice decision has “hit you”, it is important to look at how unprocessed grief can be influencing and impacting your life right now.

70% of solving a problem is understanding the problem!  Just understanding that you may be experiencing some emotional and relational angst, in your life today because of grief associated to your dark secret can be very helpful.

Here is a checklist for you to assess abortion grief points:

I’ve never told anyone about my abortion or I tried to tell someone and was invalidated or condemned.

Just like any regular grief situation, a person who gets misunderstand in their pain will shut down and isolate.  This type of rejection in the midst of explaining pain can create deep depression and cause withdrawal and detachment from others.  If you are experiencing deep depression for several days in a row, it really is time to see a professional.  Your therapist can help you walk this journey so that you are not alone in it.

I have fleeting moments of general sadness that can’t be connected to my life situation.

Whether your abortion occurred one week, one month or years ago, if you’ve pushed moments of sadness away, they will find a way to come out into the open in other random ways.  If you are starting to have these moments you can’t connect to anything because your life may be going along so well, it could be you need to address your “vpt” grief.

There are certain seasons of the year I feel blue or go into a deep funk.

If you can connect the dots of these seasonal blues to the “vpt” event, you are probably triggering off the unprocessed grief.  Common trigger dates are anniversary dates tied to the procedure.

My emotions seem increasingly harder to regulate.

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Trudy Johnson


Trudy M. Johnson, M.A., LMFT, CSPII

Helping women process grief after voluntary pregnancy termination without fear.

Bringing abortion after-care into the 21st century by educating professionals.

Location: Buena Vista, CO
Credentials: LMFT, MA, Non-Profit
Specialties: Abortion Issues
Other Articles/News by Trudy Johnson:

"I Had No Clue I'd Be This Sad," Part 2


Last week I talked with a 20-something woman about the grief she was feeling after her voluntary pregnancy termination. In her quest to find relief for her situation, she never dreamed she would be struck with an overwhelming sadness that she couldn't shake. Only a little less shocking than the news of the pregnancy (she was on birth control pills) was ... Read more

"I Had No Clue I'd Be This Sad"


The voice on the other end of the line was hesitant. I could tell this was a woman who wasn't sure she could trust her own instincts, much less trust me. I tried to re-assure her that I am a safe person to talk with about unexpected grief after voluntarily terminating a pregnancy. As we talked, I realized how many times I'd heard this ... Read more

Had An Abortion? 4 Tips For Surviving Mother’s Day


For women who once made the decision to terminate a pregnancy, Mother's Day can be an emotional and difficult day. Particularly, if you never told those closest to you about your abortion. In such cases, you may feel like you have no one to talk to about your sadness because you are afraid of condemnation. Despite the fact that an abortion can weigh ... Read more

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