Some women are surprised after an abortion that they have waves of crying spells, depression and sadness. This can last several weeks, months or even years. It is normal to grieve after an abortion, but the strange combination of relief and sadness can be very confusing. Understanding Stress & How To Manage It
Abortion grief is called disenfranchised grief. Disenfranchised grief is grief experienced by an individual that is not openly acknowledged, socially validated or publically observed. The loss experienced is real, but survivors are not accorded the "right to grieve" by anyone around them. An individual may have an intense and multifaceted reaction to a loss, yet those around him are completely ignorant or invalidating about the sadness that person may feel.
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Society at large simply is not comfortable with grief and for the most part completely ignores many instances of grief, especially disenfranchised grief. Dating After Divorce: How Soon Is Too Soon?
The experience of loss associated with abortion is real, but survivors are not afforded the "right to grieve" by anyone around them. Often women feel isolated and alone in their sadness.
What can they do? Find a safe place to talk.
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There are organizations that are familiar with this type of grief who can refer you to professionals that understand and validate your sadness. Remember, the internet is our friend. Searh for "help after abortion" or "sad after abortion" and you should be able to find some of these compassionate people who understand the wide range of emotions you are going through right now.
Disenfranchised grief is miserable and it is important to find a caring person or organization that will understand and validate your pain. The Monogamy Myth: Nothing Lasts Forever