Will I be a bad mother now that I’ve had an abortion?
Women who have voluntarily terminated a pregnancy struggle with becoming a mother for the first time, if it was the first pregnancy that was aborted. Because it is not culturally accepted to talk about or grieve a pregnancy loss due to abortion, there can be a lot of guilt, sadness and mixed emotions for women with an abortion history.
While it may seem easy to be pregnant “when the time comes” it is not always as easy as it may seem to go into a pregnancy after an abortion. Fear about being pregnant for the first time after an abortion can actually (my personal opinion) cause women to have a second abortion.
Some typical questions women might have who are pregnant after an abortion are:
1). Will I be a bad mother?
It is a natural reaction to think that since you failed the first “motherhood test” that this you are now unable to do the mothering thing at all. This is simply not true! Motherhood is something that comes naturally and easy. While all of us have to learn a lot about mothering, the natural instincts do kick in and we can take up the job with no problem. Just because you chose “vpt” does NOT mean you will be a bad mother now that you are pregnant.
2). Will God punish me now that I am keeping this pregnancy?
This is a very typical and common question. First of all, I don’t believe God is not in the business of punishing. He loves your baby more than you do and to punish you by doing something bad to the baby is simply not the way He operates! He sends consequences our way, but He never punishes us, ever.