After An Abortion: Will I Be A Bad Mother Now That I'm Pregnant?


pregnant belly
It is not always as easy as it may seem to go into a pregnancy after an abortion. It can be fearful.

Will I be a bad mother now that I’ve had an abortion?

Women who have voluntarily terminated a pregnancy struggle with becoming a mother for the first time, if it was the first pregnancy that was aborted. Because it is not culturally accepted to talk about or grieve a pregnancy loss due to abortion, there can be a lot of guilt, sadness and mixed emotions for women with an abortion history.


While it may seem easy to be pregnant “when the time comes” it is not always as easy as it may seem to go into a pregnancy after an abortion. Fear about being pregnant for the first time after an abortion can actually (my personal opinion) cause women to have a second abortion.

Some typical questions women might have who are pregnant after an abortion are:

1). Will I be a bad mother?

It is a natural reaction to think that since you failed the first “motherhood test” that this you are now unable to do the mothering thing at all. This is simply not true! Motherhood is something that comes naturally and easy. While all of us have to learn a lot about mothering, the natural instincts do kick in and we can take up the job with no problem. Just because you chose “vpt” does NOT mean you will be a bad mother now that you are pregnant.

2). Will God punish me now that I am keeping this pregnancy?

This is a very typical and common question. First of all, I don’t believe God is not in the business of punishing. He loves your baby more than you do and to punish you by doing something bad to the baby is simply not the way He operates! He sends consequences our way, but He never punishes us, ever.

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Trudy Johnson


Trudy M. Johnson, M.A., LMFT, CSPII

Helping women process grief after voluntary pregnancy termination without fear.

Bringing abortion after-care into the 21st century by educating professionals.

Location: Buena Vista, CO
Credentials: LMFT, MA, Non-Profit
Specialties: Abortion Issues
Other Articles/News by Trudy Johnson:

The Painful And Surprising Secret Many Couples With Children Keep


For couples dealing with infertility or pregnancy loss, the news of an unexpected pregnancy can be thrilling. But when handling an unwanted, unplanned pregnancy, that news can be downright devastating to couples who already have their family established with two, three or more kids if the wife, husband (or both) feel entirely against having ... Read more

Early Age Abortion? Growing Up Doesn't Mean Getting Over It


The tears were flowing for this middle-aged woman with the perfect life. "I never realized how much pain and grief I was feeling over my abortion when I was 14 years old. I guess I just blocked things out and never looked back." I am amazed at women in their late 40's, 50's and even sixties experiencing the need to re-visit a time in their ... Read more

"I Had No Clue I'd Be This Sad," Part 2


Last week I talked with a 20-something woman about the grief she was feeling after her voluntary pregnancy termination. In her quest to find relief for her situation, she never dreamed she would be struck with an overwhelming sadness that she couldn't shake. Only a little less shocking than the news of the pregnancy (she was on birth control pills) was ... Read more

See More

Latest Expert Videos
Must-see Videos
Most Popular