New Area Code; Same Love Road


New Area Code; Same Love Road

Lately a recurring conversation theme I’ve had with women and even overheard in my frequent coffeehouse haunts is that of moving for love. I’ve heard that the midwest has more family oriented guys and that the south has nicer guys. I’ve heard that big city guys don’t take women seriously and that big cities are the only place to meet men due to sheer numbers. Single women alike seem to think they live in the world’s worst dating city (cue: violin) and if they simply packed up all of their stuff, found a new apartment, new job, new friends and new life, they would instantly find a perfectly wonderful new great love.

I’m so sorry to be the bearer of bummer news, but it just doesn’t work that way. There’s simply no treasure trove of perfect guys in some hidden valley awaiting your arrival.

More from YourTango: How to Get Some HOT Single Girl Action this Valentine's Day!

Sure, moving can be an amazing booster shot of energy. I should know, I’ve lived in lots of cities and even a few countries. You get a renewed lease on life; a fresh perspective and of course, a clean slate. And while you may be exposed to a roster of fresh man meat, in your suitcases, you will surely have packed all of your old dating habits and past relationship baggage. It doesn’t matter what your new zip code is, if you don’t heal and repair your past, you will take it into your future, no matter how far you go.

The past has a funny way of following you like that, determined to help you learn and to help you grow from what was into what can be; if you turn away those opportunities they will just keep popping up again until you face them head on as the gifts that they are designed to be. So all in, this means, YOU will still be YOU. For better and for worse. It means that you will be diving into new relationships unresolved and likely just sabotaging a new zip code. Therefore, you are better off, staying put and healing your hurts in a neighborhood of comfort, love and support… and then, once you are restored and whole again, and if you still if the itch to move, and it is motivated by things other than, or in addition to man hunting, by all means, safe travels! But know this, according to the 2000 census, here are your best bets for single men*:

Chattahoochee County, GA
Union County, FL
Jones County, TX
DeKalb County, MO
Crowley County, CO

More from YourTango: 3 Reasons You Must Stop Shopping for a Husband

Hopefully the 2010 census will yield more favorable results for those of you still wanting to move for love.

Live and love largely,

Share this with someone you love (or even like a lot)!

Let's make it
FB official
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Tristan Coopersmith

Marriage and Family Therapist

Tristan Coopersmith, M.A. MFTi

Location: Hermosa Beach, CA
Credentials: BA, MA, MFTI
Other Articles/News by Tristan Coopersmith:

How to Get Some HOT Single Girl Action this Valentine's Day!


Being single on Valentine’s Day sucks. There I said it. And it isn’t just THE day that blows, it is all the days leading up to it. It is going to your local Target only to be bombarded with Valentine Day specials. It is the questioning of friends about what you will do on that night to avoid being a lonely heart. It is the Kay Jewelers ... Read more

3 Reasons You Must Stop Shopping for a Husband


There are scads of articles and books written promising a foolproof formula to finding a husband. Usually they include a step by step guide with a guarantee of success in x number of days. If you are a reader of these, time to toss them and whatever manipulation they have down to your head and heart and it is time to get real! The thing is, love takes time ... Read more

Are You Willing to Work For Love?


I’m a big believer in universal energy. I believe that everything in the universe is on loan to us to leverage as we need. I believe that we are born to love and born to be loved. I believe that it is EVERYONE’S divine right to experience rich, gorgeous, healthy, sustainable love. But what I don’t believe is that all you need to do is sit ... Read more

See More

Recent Expert Posts

Uncovering the "Scandal" Behind Abusive Relationships

The media is abuzz with the news that “Scandal” star Columbus Short recently ...

Sex: How To Make Your Wife In The Mood For Sex

Are You The Tortoise Or The Hare In The Bedroom?

If he's ready and you're not, consider putting on a sexy fashion show for him.

coming out

Coming Out In A Marriage: 6 Unrealistic Expectations

When a spouse comes out, a lot of stuff hits the fan.

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>