Detour's Doors


Detour's Doors

Ever driven the same route countless times but then missed a turn? Your mind in a cloud of confusion, wonderment, overanalyzes, or perhaps just pre-caffeination? When it dawns on you, what do you do? Immediately course-correct with a u-turn, or keep on going to uncover a new route?

The other morning, a very early early morning, I had such an occurrence. Coffee left behind, on a path I take a few times per week – a very simple path mind you that consists of only a handful of turns, I missed one of them. My mind was stuck in overdrive, thinking about a pile of “what ifs.” When I came to I was only about an 1/8 mile from the intended turn but instead of turning about, I decided to trek on to see what I might see that I’d never seen before.


My “mistake” gently winded me through a neighborhood airfield where I got to see the first plane take off for the day. It also took me past a field of wild flowers laced with freesia – a scent I adore that powerfully flew through my open windows and woke me up better than any coffee could. I then saw a lone runner wearing a t-shirt saying “EXHALE.” So I did. At which point I realized how much I needed it.

Minutes later, this alternative path led me to my, you guessed it… original destination. The magic of the experience was that my initial daze – part sleep induced, part stress induced was replaced by reinvigoration. The simple act of changing my routine and trusting that it would work out, blended with welcoming could be absorbed along the way, was a gorgeous reminder that it always does work out… and not only do things always work out, blessings abound if your eyes and heart are open to new perspectives.

As I went to park my car I was oddly compelled to turn on the radio and poetically, the song “Changes” by 2Pac came on (specifically the lyrics: “The old way wasn’t working so it’s on us to make a change”)… and I thought to myself… maybe I’ll forget my coffee more often.

When it comes to “finding the one,” trust that there is more than one way to get there. Be open to exploring all of the paths. You will increase your odds of course, but perhaps more importantly, through the process of exploration you will enrich your self-awareness and understanding. Have faith that you will arrive at your destiny by staying present and staying true to you. Welcome all of the twists, the turns and the learnings at each intersection. Have courage to get a little lost, to take the road less traveled… as those roads usually provide the greatest awakenings… and the greatest findings.

Here's to embracing life and love's detours and opening the doors they offer!

Live and love largely,


Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Tristan Coopersmith

Marriage and Family Therapist

Tristan Coopersmith, M.A. MFTi

Location: Hermosa Beach, CA
Credentials: BA, MA, MFTI
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