It really hurts when the person you love is focused more on “being right” rather than really understanding you! Does your relationship create a deep pain or numbness in your heart? When we start to believe that our legitimate needs for connection will not be adequately met by our partner, it is easy to focus on our personal needs at the expense of our partner. A normal human response to this is: nagging, petty repetitive fights, silent-treatments, numbing out, outbursts, being condescending and focusing on being right rather than really listening. We can get caught up in terrible cycles of withdrawing from or demonizing each other. The battle lines are often around libido, child rearing, money, jealousy, etc.