The search for women begins by avoiding a comedy of errors.
The age old question of how to find a woman isn't so difficult to answer because women are elusive creatures, disappearing into woodland areas the instant they hear a man approaching. Instead, how to find a woman is a difficult question because so many men incorrectly go about their search.
In fact, the second men wonder how to find women, they set off on a journey fraught with these seven unlucky, but also common, mistakes:
- Assuming Women Will Approach Them; Some women are extraordinarily outgoing and have zero qualms about approaching a man. For example, sending him a gin and tonic with her number cleverly scrawled on the barroom napkin. Many women, however, are not this forward. They hold onto their old-fashioned romanticism and believe men should be the ones to make the first move.
- Assuming They Are Entitled; Another mistake men make when it comes to women is assuming they are entitled to them. They may be rich, intelligent and good-looking. What women wouldn't want to date them? This, however, is more of a lesson on how to repulse women rather than how to find women. The truth is that men are no more entitled to dates with women than women are to dates with men. In fact, no one is really entitled to anything, despite what your third grade participation trophy has led you to believe.
- Thinking Women Won't Want Them; Perhaps the most common mistake men commit when it comes to women is a lack of confidence. This often happens to men who don't see themselves as extraordinary. They aren't rich, they aren't famous and their looks are average. However, believe it or not, most women care little for riches, fame and six-pack abs. Instead, they care about how you will treat them. Luckily for men, treating women well is something anybody can do.
- Not Looking; When a guy wonders just how to find a woman, the most obvious answer is to look. But, men make the mistake of limiting themselves to where they look. They search bars, they scour night clubs and they check out each woman who walks by their office cubicle. Yet, the search perimeter needs to be greatly expanded. For men who truly want to find women — and perhaps find the love of their life in the process — they must look everywhere.
- Pushing Sex Too Quickly; Men and women both like sex, but men like it more hands down (or hands slathered in Vaseline). Women, on the other hand, can sometimes be a bit defensive about sex. In short, they grow tired of being a sex object. So, with these defenses up, any man who pushes sex too quickly isn't likely to get in — not literally or metaphorically. Instead, the guy who gets to know a girl first and proves that he likes her for who she is rather than her orifices, will not only be more successful at answering the question of how to find a woman, but they will also be better at knowing how to keep them around.
- Settling; Frequently, settling is painted as a female thing. Women settle for guys they don't necessarily adore. Yet, men settle too, sometimes just as often. The problem with settling, however, is that it doesn't do anyone any favors. Both parties usually end up miserable. Thus, when looking for women, men shouldn't go for the ones they don't want but know they can get. They should go for the ones that they want. Even if they think they can't get the girl of their dreams, they should still try. One of the best things about relationships is that they are just full of surprises.
- Being A Jerk; The final mistake men make when looking for women has to do with playing the jerk card. Men — perhaps because of Hollywood or Country Western songs — are often under the impression that women go for jerks, and sometimes it's true. Some women do go for idiot bad boys. Most women, on the other hand, do not. For every one girl who goes for Lord of the Tools or King of the Imbeciles, ten girls go for the nice guy. In other words, the good guys may finish last on occasion, but with true love, they usually finish first.
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