My Relationship Is In Trouble, Could a Pastoral Counselor Help?

By

My Relationship Is In Trouble, Could a Pastoral Counselor Help?
There are all sorts of counselors out there - could a pastoral counselor help us?
  • what are their credentials as a mental health professional?
  • do they have training and experience for working with couples (or families)?
  • how much of their experience has been around relational difficulties?
  • do they have any special training or credentials for working on issues like yours?
  • if your situation is volatile or severe, do they have the ability to provide additional crisis help?
  • how do they keep up on the latest developments in the field?

The Benefits of Pastoral Counseling.  There are studies that show that spirituality can provide positive outcomes when applied to a variety of life crises including relational difficulties.  There are clear examples that the fostering of joint spiritual or religious activity [my article] can be a positive force for a couple to stay together.  Thus, having a counselor that is able to bring in these dimensions and help you explore them can have a positive effect on your counseling process.  The advantage of a pastoral counselor is that while able to include the spiritual dimension in the counseling process, the pastoral counselor will not be neglecting the benefits that can come from standard counseling techniques.  Especially if there is a spiritual dimension to the difficulties in the relationship or if one or more of the parties involved are very spiritual, a pastoral counselor would be particularly well situated to help around relational difficulties.
Caveat: A Pastor is NOT Necessarily a Pastoral Counselor.  It should be noted that in all of the above discussions about pastoral counseling, the reference is being made to counseling from a trained mental health professional with additional specialized training.  This is not necessarily counseling offered by any pastor.  Most pastors are not qualified mental health professionals and only have a little training in counseling.  With this training these pastors are able to help in cases that are not too serious and will generally refer to a mental health professional if the situation is more complicated.  Likewise, a pastor who is a mental health professional will usually not provide professional counseling for members of their faith group in order to be able to maintain the pastoral relationship.
Seeking the counsel of a pastor may be helpful, but if the situation requires it this should not be seen as a substitute for getting quality mental health care.  In seeking quality mental health care, you may want to look to get this from a pastoral counselor or you may seek to get this from another type of professional.  This will depend on your comfort levels, your desires as well as the availability of pastoral counselors trained for your issues in your community.
When you do get quality mental health care, including that from a qualified and trained pastoral counselor, it is possible to move towards greater peace and wholeness even when you are currently facing relational problems.

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

The Rev. Christopher L. Smith

Marriage and Family Therapist

The Rev. Christopher L. Smith, LCAC, LMHC, LMFT has served as a national leader around mental health issues both within the Presbyterian Church (U.S.A.) and in professional counseling organizations.  He works directly with individuals, couples, families and supervisees as the Clinical Director of Seeking Shalom in New York City.  He also brings his insight to help a wider audience through writing, speaking and consultations.

Location: New York, NY
Credentials: LAC, LMFT, LMHC, MDiv
Specialties: Couples/Marital Issues, Forgiveness, Spiritual
Other Articles/News by The Rev. Christopher L. Smith:

Will Marriage Counseling Work For You After An Affair?

By

Imagine you are in a situation where you have found that your husband cheated on you. When you two first discussed this, he temporarily moved out of the house. A few weeks go by and he says he would like for both of you to go to marriage counseling. Your first reaction is "no way" because he is still maintaining a "friendship" with the other ... Read more

3 Steps To Forgive Your Spouse And Repair Your Marriage

By

You have just had a fight with your spouse. As has been the case with past arguments in your marriage, the two of you are not talking. You are dreading the fact that in a few hours it will be bed time. Think honestly about what is going on in your mind. What are you thinking? Often, your thoughts are likely to be about how you were right and how your spouse has ... Read more

7 Ways To Raise Super Grateful Kids

By ,

As a parent, it can be awfully tempting to spoil your kids, especially around the holidays. And while it's okay to regale them with gifts every so often, it's essential that they learn to appreciate what they have. With that in mind, here are some tips from YourTango Experts about how to teach your kids the importance of gratitude: 1. Model ... Read more

See More

 
My Videos
ASK YOURTANGO MORE QUESTIONS
Must-see Videos
SEE MORE VIDEOS
Most Popular