- If your teenager is truly out of control, in a dangerous way, you could talk to your local child welfare office about them being identified as "a child in need of services".
- You could see how your child does in another environment - spending the summer with an out of town relative is an opportunity that may be appropriate, especially if it is timely.
- You could entertain the idea of the teenager returning home conditionally upon discussing boundaries for that - and to be most effective this does need to be a discussion. With as difficult as the relationship may have become, you may want to use a marriage and family therapist to help facilitate that conversation.
Going this route is not just giving in, it still expresses love and caring, and it has the possibility of laying groundwork for the future.
With everyone working at it and developing new ways of relating, it is possible to get through these times and establish ways for peace and wholeness in your child's life as well as in your lives.
This does not mean that you will be free of the challenges that occur during the teenage years, but you will be able to navigate these in a way that is better for everyone involved and can result in “win-win situations”.