ProConnect

Shining Your Light

By

Shining Your Light
Step into your unique, bright, brilliant self. Don't ever dim your light for the benefit of another!

So, you may keep trying to prove your value in ways you are unaware of. Perhaps you can’t accept a compliment; you get angry when someone slights you; you take things very personally because you can’t put them in perspective. Maybe you default to always apologizing – if anything goes wrong. Even if it is not your fault, you say, “I’m sorry.” Your default is your subconscious talking–your inherited values and belief systems that keep you stuck. Your false belief system. The “story” you inherited. It worked for you when you were younger, and you’ve adopted it subconsciously as an adult.

Values are also part of the story you inherited, and were impressed upon you at an early age. Often, you act by default based on those values, without consciously thinking about it. When was the last time you sat down and asked yourself what your own values are? We all are basically good people, and tend to value integrity, honesty, kindness etc. But what is important to you? Is it passion? Creativity? Drive? Financial independence? Growth? Maybe you don’t care about timeliness but really value spontaneity? You don’t know until you explore for yourself.

More from YourTango: The Blind Spot

Your default tendencies also show up in behaviors. A simple example is if you grow up in a household full of arguing, your default tendency may be, when you want to prove your point, to argue. (Also, you may feel the need to prove your point!)  It might not occur to you that perhaps this isn’t the best way to a) get what you want and b) solve the problem. In fact, argument usually completely denies a solution or compromise!

So, your light is dimmed when you are not living your authentic life, according to your values, your belief system, your inner knowing that is yearning to come out. Default tendencies are there to make life easier, but, it takes conscious effort to choose which ones to keep, and which ones to let go of. When you don’t let go of the defaults that are not serving you, you stay buried. All of the inauthentic pieces create a blanket that covers your light.

So what are some of your defaults? Where in your life are you reactive instead of thoughtfully proactive?  Where do you get buried in the details of your life? Start the process by just observing your own behaviors, asking yourself questions about what you value and believe in order to start removing what blankets your light. It’s a process, but one so very worth doing.

More from YourTango: Do You Have the Disease to Please?

 

AFFIRMATION OF THE WEEK:
Today I choose to live my life proactively. I observe what I am reacting based on old stories and when I am choosing to embody a higher vibration. More and more, I realize that guilt and fear have no place in my life of high vibration.

Share this with someone you love (or even like a lot)!

Let's make it
FB official
Recent Expert Posts
Sex: 3 Steps To Decide When To Have Sex With A New Partner

3 Steps To Decide When To Have Sex With A New Partner

Let's talk about sex: when's the right time for the first time?

Sad Dude

Contrary to Popular Belief Men, Also Suffer From Eating Disorders

The good news is the amount of resources for males with eating disorders is beginning to increase.

Hug Text

The Case of the Ex

Does the mother of his kids want him back?

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

Resources
How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>
HOT STUFF!
FROM OUR PARTNERS