If you’re like me, you want quick, yet effective ways to become the person you dream of being. Your ideal self, happy and comfortable with who you are. Effortlessly achieving your goals. Well compensated for your work. Beautifully balanced work and home life. Perfectly fit, sexually satisfied, in a fulfilling relationship and raising healthy, happy children. Did I leave anything out?
You are not alone. Little snippets of self-help catch our eye online, at the supermarket, the bookstore or on morning TV. We try these tips, they don’t work or they do work, but not for long. We devote precious time to reading an entire book that promises whole-self transformation and we take away a few meager tips – cursing what seems like too little for the time we invested. We may even begin to poo-poo anything claiming to improve our lives and decide to wallow in our junk because nothing really works.
Self-help advice can be good, if used well and wisely. If you dive beneath the surface, you will uncover a deeper truth waiting to be acknowledged. What might be in order is a new, more realistic perspective. Start with the understanding that personal development is a process. We move thru cycles and stages of need from the time we’re born until the day we die. Often we spiral around the same issues – at different times and stages, with different levels of awareness, understanding, acceptance and motivation.
In today’s hyperactive world, we also get tangled up in “the doing,” believing that is what will make our life better. Eat more (a), read (b), do more (c) and you’ll be (d). Over functioning is the new normal for women in the US. It boosts our egos – our ability to feel like super women, but it destroys our spirit and sense of peace and balance.
We seek out more and more doing, but feel less and less satisfied. All or nothing. On or off. The either-or dichotomy has us trapped…locked in its depleting death-grip.
What’s behind our over functioning, overdoing? LIES. What Labels, Illusions, Excuses and Stories are limiting us from the quality of life we long for – a life that is balanced, free, fulfilled?