3 Tools To Rekindle Romance In Your Relationship

For example, my husband and I make salad together in the kitchen and enjoy each other's company in conversation. Both of us share equally in the preparation and conversation. We might enjoy watching television together while chatting about the story and cuddling. Watch out for what is called parallel play.

Parallel play is when two people are in the same room doing the same or different things and emotionally in their own worlds. It looks like sitting on the couch watching television together with no talking, touching or interaction of any kind. Each person is playing in their own way without the others attention, which is not the purpose of this tool."The Dark Knight Rises": Helping Us All To Heal

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3. Conversion of personal positive feeling for mutual benefit. This tool involves sharing a personal excitement, such as seeing a beautiful sunset, watching a creative fun video or other fun exciting things that caused you to feel good. Then, converting that positive feeling into a statement your partner can hear.

For example, my husband finds joy in seeing small animals like squirrels when we are walking. If he takes the joy he feels and converts it for me into "I love you so much" or "I'm so lucky to be married to you," then we both feel great. My husband took his joy and converted it to my language so I can then "hear" him and "catch" his excitement. This benefits both of us. Why Katie Holmes Secretly Filed For Divorce

If my husband took his excitement about a squirrel sighting, for example, and said to me "check out that squirrel" excitedly, I may be annoyed he wasn't engaged in our conversation and not paying attention to me. The key to this tool is to convert your excitement into something your partner can get excited about too. Then you both win, with a "hit" of dopamine in your brains and romance in your veins. Help! I Want My Spouse Back. 10 Ways To Engage Your Spouse

Biologically our bodies have a pleasure reward center that can be used to our advantage. Couples can rekindle the romance by trying out these three tools. I dare you. If you need help, ask for it. Couples counselors are experts trained to help you get the romance and fun back. Remember, your mental health is influenced by the quality of your relationship. Have fun and enjoy each other. 5 Love Lessons From Olympic Athletes [EXPERT]

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Teresa Maples MS LMHC is an author, licensed mental health counselor and life coach from Gig Harbor, Washington. Connect with me for a Journey to Abundant Life.