Where do you want to spend the day? If you could imagine going anywhere, where would it be? Do you envision a romantic ski lodge with a hot tub in the Northeast or are you excited to escape to that Caribbean island for a long overdue vacation? Maybe your ideal place to spend Valentine’s Day is your own kitchen cooking a gourmet meal together, or at a playground with your children enjoying a family day.
And finally, how could you make it all – or parts of it - happen? Do you need to call a travel agent or shop for a special desert? Make a list starting today of the what, when, where and how’s of your special day. You can write these down or grab a sketch pad to draw your notes. Even if you can integrate parts of your vision, or surprise one another with a piece of your vision, it can make the day special.
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If you imagine your perfect Valentine’s Day spending it at home eating a cozy dinner in front of the fireplace, plan the food you would like to eat, bring in the wood for the roaring fire on the hearth, and perhaps shop for some sexy outfits to complete the fantasy. In your vision, are you in tuxedo and gown or are you in après-ski outfits, with thick socks and a blanket shared by two? Maybe you envision a breakfast of champagne and chocolates in bed, in silky pajamas. Start thinking about where you will buy your sexy new PJ’s.
If you fantasize about Paris for the weekend, it may be just as sexy (well, at least a close second) to shop for a poster of the Eiffel tower as a gift for your partner, and but some French pastries for desert. Let them get the French champagne. And if you are feeling creative, make a homemade Valentine’s card with “j’etaime” written in red magic marker. Remember, sometimes the home made gifts are the ones we remember the most.
When you share your vision, try not to judge your partner’s ideas if they are different than yours. Talk about what is most important to both of you, and agree on some of the more special ingredients that you both can enjoy.
What is your perfect Valentine’s Day? Share your vision, and create your perfect date… for your perfect Valentine.
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Tammy Nelson PhD is a World Renowned Sex and Relationship expert and the author of “Getting the Sex You Want; Shed Your Inhibitions and Reach New Heights of Passion Together” and “The New Monogamy; Redefine Your Relationship After Infidelity” and can be found at www.drtammynelson.com