New Year Resolutions for MEN only

By

New Year Resolutions for MEN only
New Years resolutions, for men only

Men and women are different. This seems like an obvious statement. Yet when it comes to New Year’s resolutions, the sexes do it differently. Men focus on resolutions like “make more money” or “lose weight.” But they don’t normally set up a system or strategy to make that happen. They may have goals for the upcoming New Year, but they tend to focus more on global hopes and dreams and less on step by step intentions for accomplishing their vision.
Males are primarily driven by tasks, and given a mission, they will move toward the ultimate goal, setting up steps to accomplish the end result as they go. This is somewhat different than it is for women. Women will many times make resolutions that are emotionally driven, and tend to make plans for their resolutions that are more specific, but then feel more disappointed in themselves when they don’t achieve them. These unrealistic expectations can include things like extreme diet plans or impractical daily exercise. Women don’t set time limits nor do they set up daily goals to make the bigger goal more manageable.
One way that men can use New Year’s resolutions in 2011 is to focus on the goal of their larger mission, without being so vague as to make the resolution almost meaningless. Deciding on one small change that they can integrate daily makes the mission manageable and clear with a set of definable goals and reasonable time limits. For example, if the ultimate goal is to lose weight, one might define a smaller daily goal to drink one glass of water with each meal. This way the focus on a smaller task leads toward a greater mission of weight loss.
For men, maintaining a sense of personal integrity is important to the development of self esteem. Meeting manageable goals helps a man to define who he is in the world. “I am a man who drinks more water” is more effective then “I am a guy trying to lose weight.” Any positive steps that can be compartmentalized into a smaller goal will help a man see himself as successful in the world, which helps to further his ultimate desires.


Tammy Nelson PhD is a Sex and Relationship expert and the author of “Getting the Sex You Want; Shed Your Inhibitions and Reach New Heights of Passion Together” –
 

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Tammy Nelson

Counselor/Therapist

Tammy Nelson, PhD, LPC http://www.drtammynelson.com/ email me at tammy@drtammynelson.com

Location: Ridgefield, CT
Credentials: LPC, PhD
Specialties: Couples/Marital Issues, Sex Therapy
Other Articles/News by Tammy Nelson:

Would You Stay Together If Your Partner Cheats?

By

If you have ever been cheated on, you know the pain and heartache that comes from betrayal. The hurt can last a long time, maybe even years.  So why should you stay?  Your friends and family will tell you “once a cheater, always a cheater.” But is that always the case? These days, 65% of couples stay together after an ... Read more

6 Steps To Moving Past An Affair And Reclaiming Your Lost Love

By

For many couples, an affair feels like the absolute end of the marriage or committed partnership. And for some it is. An affair can be what I call a "can opener," or a good excuse to end the relationship. But for other couples, staying together might mean hard work and a renewed commitment to one another, and with a clear path and some dedication to ... Read more

Can An Affair Ever Be Positive?

By

Intrusive thoughts, pictures of your partner with someone else, and the anger toward the one who cheated can all ruin what once felt like a deep, connected partnership.  Yet some couples seem to stay together after one partner cheats.  How do they do it? And are they really happy? Some couples who come to me for couple’s therapy see their ... Read more

See More

PARTNER POSTS