Fifty Shades has been spoofed on Saturday Night Live, read aloud on The Ellen DeGeneres Show, and talked about at every ladies book club in America. The main male character is dominating, into BDSM and always gives Anastasia an orgasm. Christian Grey knows what he is doing in the bedroom, likes to do it and often. He is in charge and takes what he wants.
But, Christian is not a cad. He never cheats on his lover, and wants her and no one else. They are monogamous from the moment they meet. In fact, he is jealous and possessive. These traits add to the fantasy and make it that much hotter. Not only is Christian Grey gorgeous and rich beyond belief, he is also totally and completely committed only to Anastasia.
This fantasy sells. It is monogamy that is hot, focused on her needs, and at the same time is unpredictable. So, he has some faults and a traumic past, which is to be expected. It gives Anastasia something to work on. She can use her nurturing and submissive attributes to fix his codependency issues. But the monogamy is what sells the story. If Grey was hot but sleeping around, the reader would hate him. He might still be sexy, he might still turn you on. But you would not want to marry him. Does Monogamy Really Work?
But hey, I do not want to ruin book three for you.
Dr Tammy Nelson is a world renowned expert in relationships, a psychotherapist in private practice and a trainer and seminar leader worldwide. She is the author of several books including Getting The Sex You Want; Shed Your Inhibitions and Reach New Heights of Passion Together and the upcoming The New Monogamy; Redefining Your Relationship After Infidelity. She can be found at www.drtammynelson.com and her Facebook page Getting the Sex You Want.