In yesterday’s blog, I let you in on a little secret I discovered recently that I am using to give myself permission to take more risks and be my more authentic self. I realized that when I hold myself back from really putting it out there it is because I am afraid of what others will think.
It’s human and typical to want to be liked. Human beings want to be part of a tribe. We want to belong and connect with others. But often this gets in the way of being fully self-expressed.
If you look at negative feedback in this light, it changes everything. Now you can experience it as you having something they want. When people celebrate the self-expression, strengths and gifts of others it is a measure of their self-confidence. And if you find yourself being critical of another, it is an opportunity to check in and notice where you feel you may be lacking.
The reality is that while others may see you and engage with you, in the end it is all about them. So there is truly no reason to withhold your brilliant, sexy, creative, intelligent, wonderful you…ever. Begin to notice when you hold yourself back or self-censor. When do you do this? What part of you are you afraid to show? How much more freedom would you have in your life if you took your foot off the brakes and let it rip?
Discovering that no one is really watching me was a big breakthrough…and it’s still a new concept. It can take a little time and practice to integrate it fully. Steps to a more bold and authentic you:
1. First, as with any major shift, it requires awareness. Start noticing when you are sucking back and when you are empowered and your extraordinary self.
2. Experiment. Consciously decide to step out of your box. Push yourself to take it up a notch three times in the next week…whatever that is for you.
3. Catch yourself mid-moment when you feel that disconnect from your power. Remember how you feel when you let loose when no one is watching and then step up your game and shift who you are being right in that moment just because you choose to.
4. When you are being your brilliant self, celebrate it and really notice how it feels in your body to have that freedom and permission.
There are places in my life where I grant myself permission to be my full authentic self and places I still hold back. But the more I can remind myself that no one is really watching…that is just me watching me, the more I can let go, have fun with whatever I am doing and live life large! Dare to be unforgettable.
And don't forget, if you need a guide on your path to finding your brilliance, you can fill out the questionnaire on my website to discover if you are a good candidate for coaching.