What’s your love motto?
You might not think that you have any kind of motto, but you do. Mottoes usually go along with universities, sports teams or corporations like: “Wisdom and learning,” “Only the best is good enough” and “Think different.”
The interesting thing is that people have mottoes too...they just don’t always realize it.
Your motto is comprised of the dominant thoughts that float through your mind. Most of us allow ourselves to be guided by our dominant thoughts and we forget that we actually get to choose which thoughts we’ll focus on and add to and which we’ll let pass on through.
If you’ve been through a divorce and you’re stepping back into dating again, you probably have a LOT of thoughts about this. You worry about being “too old,” “too jaded” or “not hip enough” to attract dates and feel special and loved again. You fear falling for the wrong person and ending up disappointed and hurt all over again.
Take a moment to identify the common themes in your thoughts about dating again. What is the motto that comes through?
If your current love motto is pessimistic, self-critical or negative in some way, know that this is going to have a strong effect. A love motto that limits you with insecurity or mistrust will make it impossible for you to attract the kind of dates and the experience you want.
It’s time to consciously choose a new love motto!
It’s time for you to direct your thoughts with more awareness and intention and, as you do, you’re going to find that this whole dating thing becomes more fun. Then when you’re ready, a new relationship in which you feel valued, respected and adored can develop easily and effortlessly.
Here are 3 love mottoes that may feel good to you...
#1: “I’m open to having a new experience.”
For anyone who has had a past love relationship or marriage, it can be a real challenge to simply have a new experience. The mind likes to compare and contrast and this is normal, but can cause big problems.
“Uh-oh, my ex used to say things like that and he ended up cheating.”
“Hmm, situations like this usually led to a fight when I was married.”
“Finally! Here’s a woman who has it all together...unlike my ex.”
Greet your comparing thoughts with a gentle reminder to return to the present moment. Re-direct yourself back to now by remembering the motto, “I’m open to having a new experience.”
#2: “I trust myself to decide what’s best for me.”
If it’s a struggle for you to trust others-- particularly when it comes to relationships-- you’re not alone. Healing completely after the betrayals and upset of your ex takes a long time. As much as you’re over your ex and ready for what’s next, part of you may hold back. Without meaning to, you are suspicious first and then gradually decide whom to trust.