Is Your Career Killing Your Marriage?

By

career
You can have both a career AND relationship success!

Don't judge your responses to these statements as right, wrong, good or bad. This is just how you are viewing the situation at this moment.

Next, fill in the blanks for these statements. Again, try not to limit your responses:

 

“One activity I like to do with my spouse is _____.”
“In the past, I have felt ______ when my spouse and I have ______ together.”
“Things are smoother at work when I _____.”
“I am most effective and efficient at my job when I ____.”

The intention of this exercise is to help you re-frame your situation and turn it from a no-win struggle to a perspective where you affirm your power of choice. We want you to remember why you are in this relationship in the first place; hopefully it's because you gain some enjoyment, passion and fun from being with your partner. We also want you to get clear about what helps you at work and to remember that you have the power of choice when it comes to your career. Maybe you've come to believe that the only way to succeed at work is to put your personal life on hold. This doesn't have to be true for you. Keep opening up to re-frames until you start to move from "either my career or my marriage" to "both my career and my marriage."

Really be where you are.

One key to moving into that "both/and" perspective is to practice being very present wherever you are. If you are at work, focus in and be as efficient as you can be. If you are at home or out with your spouse, really be with him or her. Resist the temptation to multi-task and finish up a work project while cuddling on the couch with your partner. Instead, let your mate know you're going to work for 30 minutes and then you'll join him or her on the couch for cuddling. 5 Reasons To Look Forward To Old-Age Love

The more you can be very present with whatever you are doing and whomever you are with, the higher quality connection you'll have with your partner and the higher quality performance you'll offer your employer!

Related: Strong Women: 4 Tips To Help You Drop The Guard
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Susie and Otto Collins are relationship coaches and authors who help couples communicate, connect and create the relationship they desire.  Click here to get their free ebook, Passionate Heart-Lasting Love.

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Susie & Otto Collins

Author

Susie and Otto Collins are relationship coaches and authors who help couples communicate, connect and create the passionate relationships they desire.



 

Location: Columbus, OH
Credentials: BS, CCC
Specialties: Communication Problems, Couples/Marital Issues
Other Articles/News by Susie & Otto Collins:

What To Do When You Love Him, But Don't Trust Him

By

He didn't cheat, but he still broke your heart... The wounds of an affair are usually deep, lingering and painful. But infidelity isn't the only way to destroy trust and put a relationship in danger. Betrayals come in many forms and degrees of intensity. You can be betrayed a little at a time and in very subtle ways or you can be betrayed with one ... Read more

Giving Up Control Could Be the Best Thing for Your Relationship

By

Karen thinks of herself as a relatively laid back person, but her happiness is starting to dwindle. If you took a poll of her boyfriend, family and closest friends, however, a different story emerges. You see, Karen cares a lot about the relationships she's in. Her biggest fear is losing the people she loves and so she spends the majority of her time, ... Read more

5 Tips To Grab The Communication Bull By The Horns

By

Which subject are you most likely to avoid communicating about with the one you love?: Money? Commitment? Trust issues? Jealousy? Sex? There are some common topics, and some unusual, hot button topics couples that lack effective communication skills often dance around, or simply refuse to talk about because it's just ... Read more

See More

 
Latest Expert Videos
ASK YOURTANGO MORE QUESTIONS
Must-see Videos
SEE MORE VIDEOS
Most Popular