What Magazines Won't Tell You About Dating

By

What Magazines Won't Tell You About Dating
Looking for love doesn’t have to be such difficult work!

If you've browsed the magazine racks at your local bookstore or surfed the web, you know that there's a LOT of dating advice out there. There are how to’s for using body language to get and impress a date, lists of words and phrases to say (and not to say) and much much more.

Women are often told to lose extra pounds, get a wardrobe and hair makeover, don't be too forward or too smart, but do be sexy, interesting and inviting. Men are advised to be strong but not macho, take charge but be sensitive, bulk up your biceps and tone your abs and dress and drive to show how much of a success you are.

 

Phew!

You can drive yourself crazy and end up feeling like you have zero chance attracting the kinds of dates you want if you try to follow this advice.

To sum up...

In general, magazines send the message that, in order to get dates and/or a relationship, you've got to make some major changes in your body, your manner of speaking, your interests, your spending and other areas of your life. We don't think finding love has to be such hard (and maybe impossible) work!

It can actually be very simple.

To attract someone who is a match for you, be the best you can be.

“Sure,” you're thinking. You've heard this one before. Maybe it was your mom who consoled you when you felt miserable, unpopular and ignored by your biggest crush. She (or someone else in your life) may have told you to just “be yourself” and the right person for you will come along.

Well, your mom was right.

When you step into your authentic self and really live at the highest potential you can at this time, then you're going to shine. No, you won’t be perfect, but you’re going to be someone who is interesting and attractive to others-- maybe not everybody, but the right partner for you.

When your guiding principle is to be at your best, you won't have to force yourself or try to pretend that you're something you're not. You do what needs to be done to tap into that amazing-ness that is you and then attracting love happens naturally and easily.

If all of this sounds like it will never work for you, try these 3 tips...

1. Identify your strengths.
You might think you know what your best attributes are, but you're probably missing some things. Take the time to observe yourself. Look at what you're really good at doing and your physical positives too. For some people this feel uncomfortable. They worry about being narcissistic.

The point here is not to put others down or make yourself superior, it's about celebrating everything about you that your potential partner might appreciate and adore. When you recognize your strengths, you’re shifting your focus to what you like and what you’d like to keep developing about yourself. This exercise also boosts confidence, which is an essential part of being your best.

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Susie & Otto Collins

Author

Susie and Otto Collins are relationship coaches and authors who help couples communicate, connect and create the passionate relationships they desire.



 

Location: Columbus, OH
Credentials: BS, CCC
Specialties: Communication Problems, Couples/Marital Issues
Other Articles/News by Susie & Otto Collins:

What To Do When You Love Him, But Don't Trust Him

By

He didn't cheat, but he still broke your heart... The wounds of an affair are usually deep, lingering and painful. But infidelity isn't the only way to destroy trust and put a relationship in danger. Betrayals come in many forms and degrees of intensity. You can be betrayed a little at a time and in very subtle ways or you can be betrayed with one ... Read more

Giving Up Control Could Be the Best Thing for Your Relationship

By

Karen thinks of herself as a relatively laid back person, but her happiness is starting to dwindle. If you took a poll of her boyfriend, family and closest friends, however, a different story emerges. You see, Karen cares a lot about the relationships she's in. Her biggest fear is losing the people she loves and so she spends the majority of her time, ... Read more

5 Tips To Grab The Communication Bull By The Horns

By

Which subject are you most likely to avoid communicating about with the one you love?: Money? Commitment? Trust issues? Jealousy? Sex? There are some common topics, and some unusual, hot button topics couples that lack effective communication skills often dance around, or simply refuse to talk about because it's just ... Read more

See More

 
Latest Expert Videos
ASK YOURTANGO MORE QUESTIONS
Must-see Videos
SEE MORE VIDEOS
Most Popular