Speak Up & Tell Your Truth

By

Speak Up & Tell Your Truth
5 questions to help you find your voice in your love relationship or marriage

Too many people go through their lives without saying how they feel, what they want and what they really think. They do so to keep the peace, to please or gain approval or because they’re worried they’ll lose the one they love if they don’t remain silent.

Have you lost your voice?

 

Maybe as a kid you were taught that it’s not okay to speak up about what’s important or true to you. Maybe you were treated harshly or even abused for voicing your opinion-- especially if that opinion was different from others’ opinions.

Maybe you’re a shy and private person and it’s uncomfortable for you to open up and share what you really think and how you feel. A person who has lost his or her voice might literally answer a question, but do so in a wishy-washy, timid or hedging way.

This is just another way to silence yourself.

Your partner wants to go to a slasher movie and you say, “Well, okay,” even though you know it will give you nightmares for weeks. When asked, “Are you okay if we have an open relationship?” you answer, “I guess,”not because you want to, but because you’re afraid your partner will break up with you if you’re honest and say “no.”

Why it’s important to speak your truth...

When you hide, cover over or even lie about what’s true for you, you’re not being genuine. This lands you in situations and causes you to have experiences that are absolutely NOT what you want. It’s simply not in your best interests!

Confusion and misunderstandings happen more easily when you refuse to speak up. No comment is often taken as consent or agreement when that’s not the case.

Staying silent also breaks down trust in your closest relationships. When your partner figures out you’re not being completely honest, he or she will wonder what IS true for you and maybe even worry that you’re hiding something.

Your silence may come from a deep desire to maintain peace or to keep your partner happy, but this isn’t the path to a healthy, connected and close love relationship or marriage.

If you have lost your voice, the first thing we invite you to do is to be kind to yourself. Know that with confidence, courage and awareness, you’ll soon be able to speak your truth with your partner and others in your life. When you do, you’ll open the door to a happiness you’ve possibly never known before.

Ask yourself these 5 questions to encourage you to start speaking up...

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Susie & Otto Collins

Author

Susie and Otto Collins are relationship coaches and authors who help couples communicate, connect and create the passionate relationships they desire.



 

Location: Columbus, OH
Credentials: BS, CCC
Specialties: Communication Problems, Couples/Marital Issues
Other Articles/News by Susie & Otto Collins:

What To Do When You Love Him, But Don't Trust Him

By

He didn't cheat, but he still broke your heart... The wounds of an affair are usually deep, lingering and painful. But infidelity isn't the only way to destroy trust and put a relationship in danger. Betrayals come in many forms and degrees of intensity. You can be betrayed a little at a time and in very subtle ways or you can be betrayed with one ... Read more

Giving Up Control Could Be the Best Thing for Your Relationship

By

Karen thinks of herself as a relatively laid back person, but her happiness is starting to dwindle. If you took a poll of her boyfriend, family and closest friends, however, a different story emerges. You see, Karen cares a lot about the relationships she's in. Her biggest fear is losing the people she loves and so she spends the majority of her time, ... Read more

5 Tips To Grab The Communication Bull By The Horns

By

Which subject are you most likely to avoid communicating about with the one you love?: Money? Commitment? Trust issues? Jealousy? Sex? There are some common topics, and some unusual, hot button topics couples that lack effective communication skills often dance around, or simply refuse to talk about because it's just ... Read more

See More

 
Latest Expert Videos
ASK YOURTANGO MORE QUESTIONS
Must-see Videos
SEE MORE VIDEOS
Most Popular