How To Make The First Move

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How To Make The First Move [EXPERT]
Whether you want to initiate a kiss or take your relationship to the next level, here's how.

Whether you are single, in a committed relationship or in something that's in-between, take regular time to know what you want and what you're open to. This will change, so don't assume that just because casually dating with no strings was okay with you three months ago, it is still okay with you today.

The big mistake that many people make is that they base their actions on what they think the other person wants. This approach is trouble because it takes you away from what YOU want and causes the assumtion that you can accurately know what your partner, date or prospective partner wants. First and foremost, know what's most important to you and honor that.

2. Look at the facts. Of course, nobody wants to declare her (or his) love for another person only to be laughed at or ignored. This "making the first move" stuff is risky business!

Try to be as objective as you can when deciding what move you will make, if any. Really listen to the words that your date or partner says to you. Don't fill in blanks or guess at his or her “real” meaning. Take the actions and words of the other person at face value. If something the other person says or does seems fake, focus on what feels real. When It Comes To Your Man, Looks Don't Always Matter

Pay attention to patterns in observable behavior as you do this. Having the facts — as best as you know them — will allow you to make an informed choice about what is right for you.

For instance, if the guy you're dating rarely calls or texts you but is eager to have sex with you anytime he wants, this is a pattern of behavior to notice. You might not know exactly what his intentions are but you can see what his habits have been.

3. Go with what's a match. YOU get to decide what (and whom) is a match for you and what or who is not. If it's important to you to stay in touch with your partner and feel like there's more to your relationship than just sex, let that be known. Without criticism, be honest about what you're looking for and then see if it fits with what your partner wants and is actually doing. 50 Ways To Strengthen Your Relationship

You don't have to make the first move blindly. Stay in touch with what you want and be clear about the facts of your situation. Let this guide you in deciding whether to ask him out, text him first or move on with your life instead.

Find out how to attract your perfect partner with Susie and Otto Collins' Automatic Attraction Secrets program!

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Susie & Otto Collins

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Susie and Otto Collins are relationship coaches and authors who help couples communicate, connect and create the passionate relationships they desire.



 

Location: Columbus, OH
Credentials: BS, CCC
Specialties: Communication Problems, Couples/Marital Issues
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