Fix for the Bad Habit that Hurts Your Marriage

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Fix for the Bad Habit that Hurts Your Marriage
Don't let your insecurity come between you and your partner

Take some time to look at the ways that your low self esteem make themselves known in your life. Trace the thoughts, self put-downs or other limiting habits back to beliefs or emotionally painful experiences you may have had.

Write down on paper the most frequent ways that low self esteem shows up in your life. Be sure to also write down what you think are the beliefs or past experiences that play/ed a role in you feeling negatively about yourself.

Come up with an action plan to strengthen self esteem.

Next and on the same piece of paper, write down any and all actions you could take to start to change your beliefs or heal and let go of your past.

Write down everything that comes into your mind. Don't censor yourself. Then, circle those action steps that you are willing to actually do.

Here are some examples...

  • Look for one thing I DO like about my body every day.
  • Tell my partner how I really feel in a way he (or she) can hear.
  • Remind myself that every man (or woman) I date won't be just like my cheating ex.
  • Make an appointment with a counselor or coach who can help me heal from my past.

Be as specific as you can and, if it helps you follow through, set a deadline by which you will have taken-- or at least started to take-- this action.

Stick with it and build on improvements.

With any habitual way of thinking and living, you're probably going to have slip ups. You will most likely fall back into your usual patterns of comparing yourself to others or putting yourself down.

Be persistent!

The more you can return to and stick with your self esteem strengthening plan, the quicker you'll see results you can be happy with.

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Free yourself from the stress and torment of jealousy AND improve your marriage. Free 7 Jealousy-Stopping Secrets ebook at www.nomorejealousy.com

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Susie & Otto Collins

Author

Susie and Otto Collins are relationship coaches and authors who help couples communicate, connect and create the passionate relationships they desire.



 

Location: Columbus, OH
Credentials: BS, CCC
Specialties: Communication Problems, Couples/Marital Issues
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