Don't let the "shoulds" you've amassed in your mind over the years stand in the way of your happiness. Even if you are liberal minded, you may be worried about what others will think of you for living with your partner instead of getting married.
When worries and fears come up, about what others think or whether or not your decision is morally okay, acknowledge them. Notice them and ask yourself if you truly agree with the "shoulds" that are dragging you down. Communicate with your partner about how you are feeling and keep focusing on what is most important to you.
2. Be upfront with your family. Many who are over 50 have families to consider. Some still have teenagers living at home, college students to whom they lend support or even grandchildren they help care for. This is part of the reason why it can get confusing and complicated to be in a new relationship as you get older. But, the benefits of feeling loved, loving a partner who is right for you and being happier and more alive are well worth the potential complications.
It's best to be as honest and upfront as you can with your kids, and other family members, about what is going on between you and your partner. Don't try to hide the fact that you have fallen in love and that you are about to make a commitment to one another by moving in together. This will only cause tension, mistrust and hurt feelings.
When you tell your family about your plans to move in with your partner, you don't have to justify your decision or be defensive about it. Instead, let them in on your plans and, if this will directly affect their lives, address those specific issues. Be open to questions and offer answers that are factual and to the point.
3. Be clear about expectations. An important thing to do with your partner, before you move in together, is to come to some clear and conscious agreements. Talk about the following topics together. 4 Ways To Help Your Man Get A Clue
- Money: How will you split expenses for your home, home maintenance and repair, utilities, groceries and trips? Don't assume that just because your partner always foots the bill when you two go out to eat, he will continue to pay for it all. Conversely, if you earn more or have more money saved up than your partner, be clear about your financial boundaries.
- Kids: If you or partner have children that live at home, what are your expectations for their care? What role will you each play in their lives — whether they live with you or visit periodically? Do you plan to set aside regular one-on-one time with your children?
Your relationship: It may already be understood between you and your partner that you are monogamous, or that you have an open relationship. Check in with one another to make sure you are both still in agreement.
Don't assume that just because you're moving in together, it means that you're now monogamous when you weren't before. If you are continuing an open relationship, be very clear about what that means to each of you.
Moving in together can be a beautiful and connecting way to take your relationship even deeper. Communicate honestly and openly so that you can make this transition as easy and enjoyable as possible. Boost Your Romance Without Spending A Dime