50 Things You Should Try For Hotter Sex
ProConnect

Divorce Doesn't Mean the End

By

Divorce Doesn't Mean the End
Open up to healing and your new beginning!

The end of a marriage. It only makes sense that it also can feel like the end of romance, intimacy and the kind of connection and companionship you've wanted-- even if your relationship was painful and disappointing.

When divorce happens, it can seem to be the end of your chance for love.

More from YourTango: 4 Questions You Wish You Never Asked Your Partner

We know, this can be a big, huge and painful change.

In many ways, divorce is the end...but not the kind of end you might think.

For a lot of people, divorce is the end of bickering, fighting, tension, distance, lying, cheating and maybe even abuse. Regardless of how nasty and bitter you and your ex were with one another, divorce can be the time when all of that comes to an end-- or at the very least, when that nastiness starts to lessen.

If you're going through a divorce, you're probably experiencing a mix of emotions. There might be some amount of relief and there's possibly some sadness, grief, anger and fear too.

You might have a lot of questions right now. Questions about why whatever happened to break up your marriage happened may be on your mind. You may also be dwelling on questions of whether this relationship that just ended is your last opportunity for love.

Believe it or not, you CAN have the kind of love, passion and intimacy that you've always wanted. This IS possible for you.

But, it won't come to you easily (or at all) if you continue to tell yourself that this is the end for you.

Some people literally believe that they can't go on if they're not with their ex. If you are or you feel like you will hurt yourself or another person, please seek help from a professional.

Let yourself feel whatever you are feeling.

We want you to know that your divorce is NOT the end for you and it's not your last chance for love.

At the same time, we do not suggest that you deny how you feel. If you walk around pretending that you're happy about what's currently going on in your life when you're not, it's only going to move you farther away from this new future that, we promise, is there for you.

Instead, we encourage you to allow yourself the time and space to have the emotions you're having.

As we said earlier, these might be a real mix and may be filled with contradictions. That's okay.

Cry if you need to cry. Yell and scream if you need to do that-- though it's probably in your best interest not to actually yell and scream at another person.

Find ways to let out your feelings that help you release them and that don't keep you stuck in the pain and torment you might be experiencing.

More from YourTango: 4 Game Changers for a Happier Marriage

Prepare yourself for the new beginning you desire.

Allowing yourself to have and then release your emotions is actually one way to prepare for this new life that's ready when you are. What you'll probably find is that there is a calm and clarity that comes just after you release some intense emotions.

At first, that sense of calm and clarity might not last very long, but it will be there.

Share this with someone you love (or even like a lot)!

Let's make it
FB official
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Susie & Otto Collins

Author

Susie and Otto Collins are relationship coaches and authors who help couples communicate, connect and create the passionate relationships they desire.



 

Location: Columbus, OH
Credentials: BS, CCC
Specialties: Communication Problems, Couples/Marital Issues
Other Articles/News by Susie & Otto Collins:

4 Questions You Wish You Never Asked Your Partner

By

If you've ever asked yourself the question: "Was it something I said?" chances are, it was. Communication with your spouse or partner can be a tricky business. You may have the best intentions and only want your beloved to move closer to you, but the way you choose to tell your truth and say whatever is on your mind can unintentionally cause ... Read more

4 Game Changers for a Happier Marriage

By

This year’s NCAA basketball tournament is nearing its exciting finish. If you’ve been following your favorite team to see who’s best at college basketball and hoping your bracket picks survive and win, you’ve probably been watching a lot of hoops. You’ve probably noticed something about these adrenaline-rush games... There ... Read more

How Pushy Is TOO Pushy?

By

Without a doubt, one of the most infuriating things in a relationship is when your guy gets quiet and won’t talk. You know he had a bad day and he refuses to talk about it. His response is, “I’m fine,” when you ask. Or you’re sure he’s angry because of something you did, but he won’t talk about it. You can almost ... Read more

See More

Recent Expert Posts
Cuffs

Emotional Vampires: Skills for Dealing with the Narcissist

Expert, Margaret Jacobson shares insights gained from Albert Bernstein's, book Emotional Vampires

Smooches

One-liners Guaranteed to Turn Up the Heat

Want some off the hook sex tonight? Use words as foreplay!

Make A Move

Forgiveness : The Most Important "F-Word".

Forgive so that the past no longer holds you back. It is time to move forward.

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

Resources
How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>
HOT STUFF!
FROM OUR PARTNERS