When you share your fantasy with your partner and invite him/her to join you in somehow bringing it to life, it's a risk. You are stepping outside of your comfort zone by talking about this very intimate desire of yours, and you are probably asking your partner to step outside of his/her comfort zone to be with you in this different and maybe outrageous way.
There's a chance that even just talking about your fantasy together will turn you both on. There's a chance that when you two act out your fantasy, it will open you up to a whole new level of sexual connection. And there's a chance that the whole thing could backfire, and your partner won't be interested in or turned on by what you have in mind.
Do communicate about your fantasy before you two are in the middle of foreplay or lovemaking. You can leave room for spontaneity, but make sure you have consent. Otherwise, the whole thing could be not only a turn off to your partner, it might damage trust and your connection.
Use words like, "I have a fantasy that I'd like to share with you. Maybe if you're open to it, we could play around with the idea the next time we make love." Present your fantasy with no pressure and be sure to let your partner know your intention is to heighten pleasure for both of you.
To encourage your partner to hear and consider your fantasy idea, make sure to verbally and genuinely appreciate him/her. Tell your partner how special and sexy he/she is to you. Make it known how much you value the different ways you two connect and stay close, including — but not only — when you make love. With the right approach and introduction, your fantasy can be a wonderful way for you and the one you love to be more playful and passionate together.
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