Make sure the other person is available.
There's nothing worse for your love life than to flirt with someone who is already in a committed relationship or who is out on a date that you're interrupting. Be aware of what's going on and only flirt with those who are available.
Make sure YOU are available.
If you're already with someone or you've promised to be monogamous with your partner, do NOT flirt with someone else. Flirting is not “no big deal” nor is it “innocent” if you're already in a relationship. In these cases, it's a trust-breaker.
Pay attention to power dynamics.
If you are in a position of authority over the person you are flirting with, this might be confusing and feel pressuring to the other person. Think about power dynamics and potential consequences first, before you flirt.
Don't flirt when it's an inappropriate time.
The middle of a board meeting at work or during a parent-teacher conference at your kid's school are two times when it's most likely not appropriate to flirt. Wait until the meeting is over and then pour on your charm.
Get the message if your flirting is unwanted.
Even if the one you desire is available, he or she might not welcome your flirting. There are tons of reasons why and it doesn't necessarily mean you are being rejected. Honor the other person's wishes and back off if that's the response you get.
Here are 4 favorite ways to flirt that will get positive results!
#1: Flirt without words.
There's no need for a smooth pick-up line. Catch the gaze of the one you're interested in and look into his or her eyes for a few seconds longer than you normally would. Make sure to smile in a soft and warm way too.
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Non-verbal cues can be confusing, so make sure you are feeling on the inside what you want to convey on the outside. This makes a big difference.
#2: Be real as you flirt.
Don't force or be fake about what you say or how you act. Don't pretend like you're someone you're not to hide embarrassment or insecurity. This will all come through and send the other person running in the opposite direction!
Let flirting come as naturally to you as possible and be honest. Planning out what to say before you flirt will most likely cause you to seem stiff or unreal. It's better to work more on your mood and confidence than it is to think up the perfect thing to say or try to be.
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#3: Get curious (not creepy).
Get to know the person you're flirting with by getting curious. Ask questions that you really want to know the answers to and then listen and engage as he or she talks.