When our daughter was two hours old, I looked at my husband and stated matter-of-factly, "You better have a good relationship with her for her entire life because there will come a time that you may be all we have." He just stared at me like I had horns coming out of my head and said, "She's two hours old, how could you possibly be thinking about her future?"
My reply, "Girls are tough to raise. They need strong men in their lives or they will look for one all on their own. They also get to a point where they think their mothers know absolutely nothing and may stop talking to them altogether. Having a dad in the picture is vital for her to make it."
He still thinks I am crazy, but I am pretty sure that we have found an okay balance when it comes to parenting. Admittedly, there are times when we disagree completely. He's a lecturer. I am a yeller. He comes from a family where feelings are not really talked about. I come from a family where you wear your heart on your sleeve and talk non-stop about everything. Through our 14 years of marriage and our five years as parents, we have learned a few things. Here are five parenting tips you and your spouse should know.
1. We will never agree 100 percent on everything. After a few years of trying to get him to understand me and wanting him to think like me, I finally realized that we complement each other better when we don't agree on everything. He doesn't try to change me and I don't try to change him. Do You Have Difficulty Communicating With Your Child?
Things that are important to us are worth discussing. This has proven helpful when it comes to raising kids. I want to pick the battle about getting homework completed. He wants to pick the battle about eating everything on their plates at dinner. It is okay that we do not agree on what battle is to be picked, as long as we support each other.
2. We respect each other enough to hear the other person out. Learning to parent together requires a certain amount of respect for each other. No parent is perfect and usually no parent-child interaction during a crisis is perfect. Respecting one another is crucial in making it through those stressful moments. I always say that parents are crisis responders for their children. In that same spirit, we are crisis responders to our co-parent. How To Show Your Love As A Mother Figure
While we may not understand why the other parent wants to pull out his hair because a child said, "No, I'm not going to bed," we must acknowledge that we are not walking in their shoes. Perhaps this came at the end of a very long day, where nothing went right for our spouse and he is at his wits end. Respect each other enough to see the big picture and hear each other out.
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