It’s seems like most all my male dating coach peers strongly agree on one particular issue: If you want more than a hook up with a guy, never end up having slept with him too soon. They all seem adamant about how it ruins a woman’s chances and how men categorize ‘easy’ women in the fun time pile, which never gets thrown in with the marriage material pile.
While I don’t disagree with their advice, I do disagree with their theory. Even though these coaches are men and thus know things I don’t, I know things they don’t by being a woman.
What I’ve found is most men don’t care if you’re quick to tussle. Many of my girlfriends snagged their guys after giving it up early. In fact, I slept with my ex-husband pretty quickly after meeting him and he still married me.
The issue I have with premature romping is that many women use sex as a weapon to hook a man, and that’s a bad idea. Here’s why—A man may not have a problem getting down and dirty with you early on, but your sex isn’t an insurance policy that he will want more. If you sleep with him and assume that your great sexual performance will seal the deal and make him swoon, you’re setting yourself up for heartbreak and shattered self-esteem. Men can easily separate a great lay from a great gal.
My advice is that you wait and make sure he likes you. The waiting won’t necessarily make him like you more, but jumping into bed isn’t going to bring him closer either.
This article was originally published at Single Warehouse. Reprinted with permission from the author.