So you’ve been dating for a while and everything seems to be headed towards wedded bliss and happily ever after, but is it really? Sometimes we fool ourselves into thinking that a relationship is for us, when it really isn’t. Sometimes we’re scared to be alone so we hang onto a relationship. It’s almost as if we are wearing blinders – our friends and family may see that this is NOT the relationship for us, but we insist on maintaining the relationship, no matter how much effort it takes or how tired we get of it. After all, this is your soul mate, right? Well, here are some tips that you should look out for when trying to determine if the relationship is truly headed towards relationship nirvana or if it’s a poisonous relationship!
You Know You’re in a Poisonous Relationship When
1) Your friends and family all have nothing to say when you have asked them for advice
Very often, we don’t realize how much we rely on the opinions of our friends and family when we are in a relationship. After all, if they like him, then he must be okay, right? They’re the ones who are able to take the step back from the situation and see the big picture. Well, guess what, they see the big picture, and if they’ve repeated themselves one too many times, they have nothing left to say because you obviously are not listening! This usually happens when deep down you know something is wrong so you constantly ask, hoping somewhere in your subconscious that they will say it’s okay. It’s also when your subconscious ignores their warnings. If they’ve stopped telling you yes or no when you describe situations, then it is possible that you’ve been ignoring warning signs. My advice? Ask them, nicely, to repeat what they think because this time, you’re listening.
2) You absolutely hate their friends and family
But the relationship only has two people in it right? WRONG. As much as I would like to deny it, and as much as I did deny it before I got married, you marry the man and his entourage…so you have to be able to at least stand them. Luckily for me, I married into a family that is not very close, so I don’t have to put up with them very often. They are not my favorite people, but I can still have a Christmas dinner without groaning every two seconds. I even laugh once in a while. If you don’t want to be miserable for the rest of your life, try to determine exactly how you feel about your husband’s favorite people other than you, because they will be around during your long-term relationship whether you like it or not – oh, and all those movies where the man ditches his mates because he loves you so much? Yeah…only in the movies…