Ever since relationship counselor John Gray (click here for a bit more about him and his work) wrote his bestseller “Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus”, promoting the idea that communication difficulties among heterosexual couples are unavoidable because men and women speak different languages, I’ve wondered whether that’s really true. Of course, I decided to immediately conduct a bit of sociological research by paying attention to the ways men and women I knew interacted.
I started by looking at the things I and my friends complained about when we talked about the men and women in our lives. Most often, the ladies were saying that when we described problems in our lives to our men, they responded not with sympathy or understanding, but with solutions. ”I wish he knew to just let me vent instead of always dismissing my problems with an easy solution!” they said. Men told me that their women didn’t accept or appreciate their efforts to help her deal with her daily struggles. ”I wish she knew I only offer solutions to her problems because I care about her and want to help!” they said.