When dating, a lot of people have a check list of what they want in a partner. They also have dating deal breakers or red flags. Red flags can range from emotional unavailability to mom or dad issues that they never dealt with as a child or as an adult. Some of my friends have check lists so they can visualize their perfect mate in their minds. But do they actually work?
High Expectations in Dating
Knowing when someone will not fit the mate you are looking for is a great skill to have. Unfortunately, people tend to think that their mate will change whatever habits they have that annoy you. But, unfortunately, very few change and for the most part they do not agree with their mate about what needs to be fixed, changed, or thrown out. I have a friend who has a check list that has over a hundred items. I asked her why she thought she was still single, she said it was because her prince hadn’t arrived yet. I didn’t want to burst her bubble so I kept quiet. But the reality is the reason she is alone and single is because she is inventing someone who does not exist. I am pretty sure that the people who make these lists are either still single or narrowing down the list a bit to open up more possibilities in the dating world.