Marriages always begin with so much hope and excitement for the future. Engaged couples head to the alter with enthusiasm, ready to begin their happily ever after.
But, what happens when the honeymoon phase is over?
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Divorce is all too common in America and many couples unknowingly make mistakes that lead to the dissolution of love.
Are you making a relationship mistake that will lead to divorce?
Here are the top 5 mistakes that lead to divorce:
1. Disrespecting your spouse
Respect is a cornerstone to a healthy marriage and creating mutual respect is vital to the longevity of your union. Teasing, eye-rolling, and public trash talking are all things that should be avoided at all costs.
Teasing is especially destructive to a marriage because cutting remarks can wound deeply. Even if said in jest, some comments just aren’t funny. Plenty of couples will tease each other in what starts as playful banter but can quickly degrade into hurtful jabs.
Make sure you communicate respect to your spouse at all times. Your partner will be more willing and able to lavish you with love and affection when they feel respected and this respect will help your marriage flourish.
2. Focusing on the negative
Negative thinking can easily snowball out of control. Once we start focusing on negative thoughts about our partner, it’s hard to stop them. Therefore, it’s wise to be mindful of the true importance of any transgression.
If your spouse is abusive or exhibiting other detrimental behaviors, calling it quits can be the best option. However, if you realize that your irritations are not deal breakers, try to release your negative thoughts. After all, no one is perfect. Both your mood and your marriage will benefit from positivity!
Try writing your partner a love letter or simply make a list of all the reasons you married your spouse. These simple affirmative acts, practiced often, will help your union to no only survive but to thrive.
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3. Choosing “me” instead of “we”
While it’s vital to practice self-care and nurture your own needs, be careful not to constantly choose “me” instead of “we”. Focusing solely on your own needs will cause you to abandon the needs of your relationship. Rather than living two separate lives inside of your marriage, ensure that you commit to activities that you enjoy doing as a couple. Connecting with each other regularly is imperative to creating a divorce-proof marriage.
4. Making the kids your #1
Have you fallen into the common pitfall of putting your kids before your marriage? Any parent knows how hard it becomes to keep the romance alive once kids come along. Mothers especially can become victim to placing priority on the children. This misguided precedence will take its toll on the marriage and can set the stage for separation.