Because being "nice" is awfully overrated.
As adults, we know that the naughtier we are, the more gifts we receive. So why not be extra naughty this holiday season with someone you enjoy being naughty with?
Below are some tips for planning a naughty Christmas getaway or a New Year's Eve to remember. Whether you visit Vegas, Paris or decide to stay in your hometown, there's no reason you can't have a jolly old time this year with an unconventional celebration.
1. Decide what kind of sexy holiday you want to enjoy.
Forget about the fattening eggnog and hanging the stockings by the chimney with care. This year, you're looking to create a holiday experience you'll always remember. But before you can begin your naughty holiday plans, you must first make up your mind about what kind of memories you want to create and where you want to create them.
Do you want to go to a swingers bar? A fetish party? What about a brothel or strip club? Maybe you're keen on the idea of being a voyeur and watching someone else's naughty holiday rather than creating your own. No matter what you decide, determining what kind of naughty adventure you want to experience will make it easier to plan your trip.
2. Choose a naughty destination.
Now that you know what type of sexy holiday you're looking for, you can decide on a city. For example, if you're looking to frequent a brothel, then you should do your homework and find out where they're located. (Legalized prostitution in the U.S. is available only in Nevada.)
If you're looking for a lawful and legitimate, super swanky swingers club, then Paris is the place for you. If you want to make an appearance at a hardcore fetish club, London and Germany are great places to check out.
3. Research local laws.
Sure, you're a naughty traveler who likes to live on the edge but nothing will ruin the holidays faster than a night in the slammer. Before you go traipsing the world looking for a good time, make sure to do your research.
If you want to enjoy a topless stroll down the beach, make sure the beach you select welcomes this kind of naughty behavior. If you're looking for a nudist colony, make sure you look into the laws that govern the area when you find one. In some countries, a violation of sexually-based offenses is a big deal.
4. Choose a naughty hotel.
There are countless hotels around the world that specialize in naughtiness and many you can make naughty with their amenities. Before choosing a hotel, do some preliminary investigation. Such as, do the bedrooms have mirrors near the beds or on the ceilings, as they do at Burj Al Arab in Dubai?
Find out how late their hot tub/swimming pool stays open for some late night fun. How big are their showers, and do they have seats in them so you can have easier shower sex? Do they have a steam room and is it unisex?
If the hotel is small they will usually have a unisex steam room, making it perfect for sex. Steam rooms are perfect for hiding what you're doing as people can't see you and you have enough time to stop what you're doing if someone walks in. Finding a naughty hotel is easy if you know what you're looking for along with calling ahead.
5. Make a naughty itinerary.
Once you've decided where to go and where you want to stay, be sure to have naughty things planned for your trip. Being naughty is something that usually happens spontaneously, but when you're going on a naughty holiday, it's best if you know what you're going to do when you get there.
You may want to book tickets to a sexy peepshow or nude play. Or perhaps you want to go to a swingers bar. Remember, you don't have to wait until the sun goes down to be naughty. There are a lot of things you can do on a naughty holiday during regular business hours.
6. Pack for your sleigh ride.
Maybe you're not going to hitch a ride on Santa's sleigh. In fact, if you really want to make this holiday memorable, splurge a little and buy a first-class ticket or rent a fancy car. No matter how you get there, be sure to pack according to the nature of your naughty holiday.
Of course, you'll always want to pack lots of condoms. If you're headed to a fetish club, then you'll want to pack your best latex outfit and bring some leather whips. If you're looking for topless or nudist beaches, you need to pack your bathing suit because you'll need to wear something before you get to the beach.
7. Don't forget the sex toys.
Santa might have cute little dolls and pocket-sized trucks in his bag, but we prefer toys of a different variety. You can't have a naughty holiday without the proper essentials.
There are plenty of sex toys on the market that have been designed for those who are traveling. For example, there are bullets that fit discreetly into your evening purse and toys that have been made to look like something else so you won't be embarrassed by the nosey security guard who searches your bag.
8. Remember to play it safe.
Always, always, always bring condoms. You don't want to go away for the holiday and come back with a gift that keeps on giving. Many naughty holiday locations (brothels, swingers clubs) will supply them, but it's good to have your own just in case they don't have your size.
Make sure to use condoms when having sex, even if you're just performing fellatio. It's better to be safe than sorry. Also, get tested for STDs. Remember, there are still things you can get even if you use a condom, like herpes and genital warts. So play safe.
This article was originally published at Naughty Travel Guide. Reprinted with permission from the author.