You show your lover attention everyday. It's time you do the same for yourself.
Self-confidence is a key aspect of successful living and it is definitely an important element in romantic relationships. If you lack confidence and self-assurance, you will likely experience a number of problems as a result.
For starters, insecurity breeds jealousy, contempt and low self-esteem. In order to truly enjoy an intimate relationship, you need to learn to love yourself first. After all, how can you give away what you don't have?
You simply cannot love another and completely give yourself to them if you are a broken, incomplete person. Only when you love and appreciate yourself are you able to fully participate in a relationship with someone else. Plus, when you have self-confidence, you won't settle for less than the very best when you are looking for a partner.
So, how does one go about learning to love themselves? Simple: by dating yourself.
This may sound silly at first, but trust me, it works. In the same way you would date a man, fall in love with him and treat him like royalty, so you should begin treating yourself. For now, if you’re single, stop seeing other people.
Date yourself exclusively and learn how to love yourself. Even if you're in a relationship, you can still accomplish this by sitting down with your partner and letting him know what you plan to do.
Sometimes we just need a little time to ourselves for self-improvement. This doesn't mean you're going to ignore your partner or shut him out completely. Just let him know that you need one or two days out of the week for a while to complete this process. You show your lover you love and care about him every day. It's time you do the same for yourself.
Here are a few simple steps to help you learn to love yourself more and boost your self-confidence:
1. Pamper yourself.
Just like you would go all out by getting ready for a date, do this every day for yourself. Get in the habit of taking care of your appearance, looking after your own physical well-being and taking care of your own emotional needs.
Don't just go through the motions of getting ready. Instead, take your time to indulge yourself. Don’t just shave or exfoliate for a date, do it every day. Don’t just wear make-up for a date, look gorgeous every day.
Don't just dress nice, wear good perfume or put on body oil when you have a date. Do it every day. When you look good, you feel good. It’s that simple.
2. Buy yourself some flowers.
Don't wait for someone else to buy you flowers. Go to the florist and pick out a beautiful bouquet all by yourself. Do this because you love yourself and you want to do something nice for yourself.
Flowers always make us smile and we feel bright and cheery inside when we surround ourselves with them. Put flowers in your bedroom so you can see them when you wake up and again when you go to bed.
Get some for your office. You can even send yourself flowers to your work and let people wonder who they might be from. No one has to know but you. Be your own secret admirer!
3. Make time for yourself.
Some people can't be by themselves for long. They have this insatiable need to be around other people. This is largely because they don't enjoy their own company and can't stand being alone. You must find time for yourself.
If you can find time for your partner, then you ought to find time for yourself. Even if you happen to be a very important woman with tons of very important responsibilities, you should never be too busy for yourself. If you have to give up an activity or forgo a commitment, do it.
“You time” should be on the agenda every week. Use the time to do something you like. Sometimes women get so caught up in pleasing their partner that they give up their own hobbies and interests.
If you like reading, set aside an hour a day or once a week to read your favorite book. Maybe you want to take up cooking classes or learn a new language. Or you just want to relax an hour every day after work by drawing a bath and enjoying a good glass of wine.
Whatever it is, make sure it's something that makes you feel good about you.
4. Treat yourself to something nice.
Just as you would buy a sexy dress for a hot date with a man, buy one and head out for a night on the town with yourself. You may want to wear it out for an evening with your girlfriends. Perhaps you would like to put it on and strut your stuff into a swanky bar for afternoon cocktails.
Buying yourself something that looks good on will definitely help with your confidence. Dress for yourself, not a man and never wait for a man to treat you to something you can take care of yourself.
It doesn't have to be a dress. It can be shoes, a new purse, scarf, earrings or panties—anything that makes you feel sexy.
5. Wine and dine yourself.
That's right, take yourself out on a date. Get ready like you would if you were going out with some hot guy. Wear something sexy, get yourself flowers—the whole nine. Then head out to your favorite restaurant.
Don't rush, take your time and enjoy your evening out. Even order dessert. The whole point of taking yourself out is to learn that you are the only company you need. When you love yourself enough to do something spectacular for yourself, you become comfortable in your own skin, no matter where you are.
6. Make love to yourself.
Learning how to make love to yourself is essential to making love to someone else. Masturbation is very important for your sex life. This subject makes many people uncomfortable and speaks to the old adage: there are two types of people in this world—those who masturbate and those who lie about it.
When you become comfortable with yourself and your own sexuality, you reach a new level of self-confidence. Masturbating is great for your health and it allows you to get to know your own body. This makes you better in bed for your lover.
So, after you take yourself out for the evening, come home and woo yourself just like you would for a man after a hot date. Light candles, play music, pour a glass of wine and put on your sexiest lingerie.
Pick out your favorite sex toys and please yourself. Take thirty minutes or more to make love to yourself, trying out different things. Be sure to incorporate ice cubes, whip cream, lubricants and other sensual elements to your lovemaking session.
Make the commitment to having a long-term relationship with yourself and try this regime for several months. Soon, you will discover that you are an amazing woman with a lot to offer.
You will learn to love yourself and that love will extend not only to your romantic partner, but also to your friends and family. When you truly love yourself, and possess an unyielding self-confidence, you will discover a quality of life you've yet to experience, one that far surpasses your expectations.
This article was originally published at Naughty Lifestyle Guide. Reprinted with permission from the author.