You may remember the old song "Breaking Up is Hard to Do" ... and it's the damn truth! Time will heal your aching heart, but the meantime can be a mean time and breakups are a real bummer. Thankfully, there are some things you can do to speed up the process and get that breakup in your rearview mirror ASAP.
While recovering from a breakup, don't deny yourself a good cry, but once you do, move on. Build a bridge and get over it. Everyone responds to pain in their own, unique way. Some people take longer than others to move beyond a broken relationship. The depth of your pain usually depends on how long you were with your partner and how much you really cared for them. Nevertheless, you should give yourself permission to express your feelings, mourn the loss of the relationship and heal the hurt.
Dr. Daniel G. Amen, author of The Brain in Love claims, "When we love someone, they come to live in the emotional or limbic centers of our brain. They actually occupy nerve-cell pathways and physically live in the neurons and synapses of the brain. When we lose someone through a breakup our brain gets disoriented. Since the person lives in neural memory connectors, we expect to see them, hear them, feel them and touch them. When we cannot touch or talk to them as we usually do, the brain centers where they live become inflamed looking for them."
Dr. Amen also said that over-activity in the limbic brain has been associated with depression. This is why we tend to isolate, have trouble sleeping, lose our appetites and cry when we've got a broken heart. Dr. Amen continued, "A deficit in endorphins, which modulate pain and pleasure pathways in the brain, also occurs which may be responsible for the physical pain we feel during a breakup." Fascinating!
Whether you did the breaking up or you've just had your heart broken, there are ways to make your situation just a little easier to bear. Read on for 12 quick and easy tips that will turn your breakup into a breakthrough:
1. Drink St. Johns Wart Tea. This may sound silly, but breaking up can take a toll on the body. This rejuvenating tea helps heal the mind, body and spirit. Intense emotions surge powerful chemicals to the brain which can be physically exhausting. Anxiety and rejection cause dramatic changes to the brain's level of dopamine, also known as the "feel good" neurotransmitter. Because breakups initiate a fight or flight response the body often reacts with depression, anger and sadness. It may also cause a jolt of adrenaline to the body, which makes people irrational and hyper-sensitive. St. John's Wart comes in both pill and tea form and is said to return the brain to a natural state and calm anxiety.
2. Eat dark chocolate. Who doesn't love chocolate? Of course, you should never indulge in the kind of chocolate binge eating you often see in romantic comedies. In moderation, dark chocolate has a positive effect on one's sense of well-being and cognitive health. Chocolate contains phenylethylamine (PEA), the same chemical your brain creates when you feel like you're falling in love. It may be hard to pronounce and difficult to spell but PEA encourages the brain to release endorphins, which is why chocolate makes you feel happier. Darker chocolate is best because it contains less calories and fat than the richer, lighter chocolates. For a limited time only, it's okay to eat chocolate and not feel guilty but be careful as you don't want to put on ten pounds in the process of lightening your mood. Keep reading ...
More breakup advice from YourTango: