How I Came Out Of The Closet On National TV

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man microphone suit and tie
... and why I've been coming out of the closet for my entire life.

It wasn't overtly apparent to me. After all, I was in the womb preparing to journey down the birth canal. Bright lights, bug eyes staring at me, faces too close to my delicate skin and loud voices all awaiting me at the end of the tunnel. Of course, there was also the warm bath to remove the crusties and a heat lamp that I would later appreciate as a tanning bed. But most importantly — even if it didn't carry a Vera Wang label — a fluffy blanket, replacing the warm swimming pool of mom's womb, awaited to warmly swaddle me and protect me from this scary thing called the outside world.

At that moment, I had my first "coming out" experience. Of course, it meant nothing to me — my mental capacity was yet incapable of grasping what "coming out" and being gay meant. Still, the DNA wire crossing was complete, never to be undone.

 

Age 19, hormones raging, second year in college, 1,000 miles from home, I was confused, putting on a good front, sneaking off campus to dance classes, sneaking peeks at certain male dorm-mates, wondering what the heck was happening. Finally mustering up the courage to call mom and dad and have the talk, I did it ... I came out! 

Doing the best they could with this new revelation, spiritual therapy with the college pastor was the route taken to help me through this confusion. I did my best, swallowed my true feelings, set aside my thoughts about how handsome the pastor was and moved on through the therapy.

Finished college. Landed my first job. Stepped into my first experience of living on my own in a remote area of New Mexico, completely capable of exploring my sexuality. And, I did ... kind of. Mostly in my mind with a few random hook-ups, even though that phrase hadn't really been coined yet. 

Moved to Texas, stepped up in my career, met a great gal and decided "Let's get married; that will fix everything." Not exactly. What it did was allow for me to shine in front of every else's eyes and pull the wool over my own, just enough for me to exist and get by ... for 13 years! Keep reading ...

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Article contributed by

Rick Clemons

Author

Rick Clemons, The Gay Man's Life Coach & The Coming Out Coach

Rick is a straight-forward, compassionate, insightful, challenging, mentor, guide, and Certified Professional Coach who's been featured on The Ricki Lake Show, and is a highly sought after radio show personality, blogger, author, and faculty member of Sex Coach U. His loving, challenging, gentle, and inspiring approach ignites a fire in clients, helping them get through the darkest moments of life and come out the other side, kicking butt, and being authentically themselves.

Rick thrives, working with individuals, and those in their inner circle, as they embark on the journey out of the closet and beyond. He specializes in helping people build confidence, live their passion while loving their work, and live authentically. Authenticity isn't just a word he throws around lightly. It's the backbone of his practice and the manner in which he personnally strives to live each and every day of his own life.

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Location: Riverside, CA
Credentials: ACC, CPC
Specialties: LGBT Issues (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender), Men's Issues, Sexuality
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