Gay Sex And Broken Pipes: 5 Sexy Alternatives To Try With Your BF

By

Gay Sex: What To Do When You Can't Get An Erection
If you can't participate, consider becoming a spectator.

Contrary to popular belief, gay men don't always have the greatest sex. I know this because I'm gay, 50, and my plumbing (a.k.a. my penis) isn't working like it used to. It's putting a damn crimp in my sex life with my partner and there's no magic "As Seen On TV" miracle cure for bringing Mr. Happy back to life. Actually, that's WRONG!

Mr. Happy can be just is happy in the realm of gay sex, even if he can’t stand at attention. If there's one thing I know, even though I was late to the gay sex game, is that my body is a sexual playground, even if my penis doesn't agree at times. I can't believe I'm admitting this on a national blog for all to see. But I'm man enough to admit it, without it being an assault on masculinity and without it making me feel like I'm less than anyone because my sex life has been altered.

Hear me now and hear me roar...hetero or gay...at some point all of us men will face the deflated, why don't you wake up and stand at attention penile disappointment. And that's OK! It doesn't have to mean your life is over unless you buy into that belief. Here's why gay sex and the broken pipe blues aren't the end to your sexual pleasures.

1. Expand Your Territory 
Orally stimulate the nipples, even if you've never been a nipple man before. You'll be surprised how those little round nubs can make erotic pleasure come (no pun intended) to life!

2. Find The "S' Zone
Kind of like the "G-Spot," the "S" Zone is the "I'm older and wiser, so now stimulate me here zone!" Just because the blowjob or the anal stimulation doesn't get your rocks off doesn't mean you've hit the end of the trail. Your body is a sexual zone, so play with it and see where it leads to enhance your newly reengineered gay sex experiences.

3. Be A Voyeur
Take pleasure in watching him. I'll admit, even before the pipes started to get a little rusty, I found pleasure in watching my partner masturbate and feel pleasure. I'm now grateful that I see the value in that experience. When I can't get an erection and he can, it still brings me pleasure to watch him buff the banana. Every once in awhile that's all it takes before I realize that Henry (my penises pet name) is at full attention and pre-maturely ejaculating. Hey, a premature ejaculation during sex is better than none at all, RIGHT?

4. Be Easy...On Yourself
Stop beating yourself up! Obviously beating yourself during gay sex and beating yourself up during gay sex are two different things. Or maybe they're not if you're into the BDSM gay sex scene. Regardless, don't screw with your mind while your trying to screw during sex. The more in your head you are about "not performing" like you used to, the more likely you'll not perform during "gay sex." Got it?

5. Expand Your Horizon
Remember it's about the whole relationship, not just sex. I know it's a bad picture in our minds to think about our parents having sex, but hey, if they're one of the lucky ones to still be married, (even if it's a second marriage), and their relationship survived, takes some cues from Mom and Pops. Even though they're not having gay sex, or maybe they are and it's their little secret, remember it's about more than just sex. It's about love, intimacy, and being in it for more than the proverbial "money shot!"

So now that I've bared my soul about my gay sex life, and thankfully there's no naked bare shots of me to accompany this article (I wouldn't want to torture you), I only hope that something I shared will help you and your gay sex age gracefully and fabulously. If you feel you're not and it's not then here's one last tidbit...Pour yourself a nice glass of Pinot Noir, hit up your favorite porn site, and remember the good ole' days when Mr. Happy was actually happy. At least nostalgia will never go out of style!

Having plumbing or relationship challenges? Not sure why you can't land and keep man? Tired of gay sex just being gay sex and nothing deeper? Schedule an introductory "Get me out of my gay sex doldrums coaching session with Rick Clemons, The Gay Man's Life Coach" Today!

More gay sex advice on YourTango:

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Rick Clemons

Author

Rick Clemons, The Gay Man's Life Coach & The Coming Out Coach

Rick is a straight-forward, compassionate, insightful, challenging, mentor, guide, and Certified Professional Coach who's been featured on The Ricki Lake Show, and is a highly sought after radio show personality, blogger, author, and faculty member of Sex Coach U. His loving, challenging, gentle, and inspiring approach ignites a fire in clients, helping them get through the darkest moments of life and come out the other side, kicking butt, and being authentically themselves.

Rick thrives, working with individuals, and those in their inner circle, as they embark on the journey out of the closet and beyond. He specializes in helping people build confidence, live their passion while loving their work, and live authentically. Authenticity isn't just a word he throws around lightly. It's the backbone of his practice and the manner in which he personnally strives to live each and every day of his own life.

Join Rick's Monthly "Guyz Like Us" Free Coaching Call For Gay Men!

Connect with Rick through his Coming Out & Life Coaching Newsletter.

Schedule A Discovery Session - Click Here

Twitter - @rickclemons
Facebook -The Gay Man's Life Coach & Rick The Coming Out Coach
You Tube Channel -The Gay Man's Life Coach & Coming Out Coach

Location: Riverside, CA
Credentials: ACC, CPC
Specialties: LGBT Issues (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender), Men's Issues, Sexuality
Other Articles/News by Rick Clemons:

Gray And Gay: Why You Shouldn't Fear Coming Out Late In Life

By

As the gay marriage movement gains momentum and even the President is on board with the idea of it, more and more people are able to walk proudly into their sexual truth. Coming out happens no matter your age, race or cultural heritage. It's happening minute-by-minute, day-by-day. Granted, the challenges to come out and be yourself can be more difficult ... Read more

10 Tips For Parents Who Find Out Their Kid Is Gay

By

"Mom, Dad, I'm gay." Rarely are these words met with fanfare and rainbow flags flying, except in the rare instance when your parents already knew and were just waiting for you to admit it. The more common reactions are fear, disappointment, confusion and outright anger. But the worst is when a parent's first thought is, "how am I ... Read more

Is He Checking Me Out? What Gay Men Think In The Locker Room

By

Michael Sam made headline news when he shared a celebratory kiss with his boyfriend after hearing that he was joining the St. Louis Rams. With the rise in openly gay athletes participating in professional sports, many people are wondering if gay athletes are more or less prone to check out other athletes in the locker room. My answer? Absolutely not! The ... Read more

See More

GET MORE ARTICLES LIKE THIS IN YOUR INBOX!

Sign up for our daily email and get the stories everyone is talking about.

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

FROM AROUND THE WEB