Is Gay Marriage Messing With Your Gay Relationship?

By

Is Gay Marriage Messing With Your Gay Relationship?
Don’t let the Politics of “I Do” cool down what’s happening between the sheets and in your life!
  1. Don’t hold it in but don’t spew it out. If you’re really not sure what or how you feel about getting married, then be honest and direct without being bitchy about it or pointing a finger. “I know this is important to you, but quite honestly, I’m not sure how I feel about being married.”
  2. Realize what you hear isn’t necessarily what they meant. Clean out the ear was, turn up the hearing aid, and intuitively listen to what your partner says and means. Underneath it all lies the real issues and it may not necessarily be what’s said on the surface.
  3. “C” Phobia my not be curable. At some point in time, most of us, gay or straight, experience “commitment phobia.” What feels good at the beginning of the Bell Curve of the relationship may peak out and start its downward descent as soon as the “MMMMAARRRIIIEEED” word get’s uttered. If this is the case, explore if this is a terminal case of “commitment-titus” or a “24-hour bug.” Trust that the discoveries you uncover are the prescription you need to heal your relationship, even if it means...”It’s been great, see ya!”
  4. If it’s a Ford then it’s not a Mercedes. Certain cars come well equipped for the long haul and after factory parts and accessories never quite perform the way the originals would have. Nor do they bring you the satisfaction you would expect. As much as you may desire to harness Mr. Man with the great abs and tush that you can bounce a quarter off of, if he’s not equipped with the accessories that marriage is made of, he more than likely never will be. Enough said!
  5. Read the fine print. Dreamy or not, marriage ain’t for the faint of heart. Regardless of the length of time you’ve been together, there is a sense of sensibility that is required before signing the dotted line. Understand what you want and desire from taking your relationship to the next level, and conversely the same goes for your other half. It’s called “communicating.” What a novel concept.

This isn’t Martha Stewart’s Gay Marriage For The Budget Conscious, or Dr. Phil’s Gaily Married Ever After. If anything, it’s mainstreaming and up-leveling your relationship just like any other couple face sprior to walking down the aisle. After all, if you think a Bridezilla is bad, you ain’t seen nothing until you’ve seen an Abercrombie Model look-alike Groom go from poised and charming to “girl look out” in two flips and a snap of his fingers.

Suffice it to say, “Happily ever after,” takes focus, work, partnering, understanding, and clear-cut communication. Rather than choke on luscious taste of Godiva Chocolates, avoid the candy coated, tip toeing around the subject and turn to your boyfriend/girlfriend and say, “So, how do you feel about gay marriage.” Get it out, get it on, and get it understood.

Article contributed by

Rick Clemons

Author

Rick Clemons, The Gay Man's Life Coach & The Coming Out Coach

Rick is a straight-forward, compassionate, insightful, challenging, mentor, guide, and Certified Professional Coach who's been featured on The Ricki Lake Show, and is a highly sought after radio show personality, blogger, author, and faculty member of Sex Coach U. His loving, challenging, gentle, and inspiring approach ignites a fire in clients, helping them get through the darkest moments of life and come out the other side, kicking butt, and being authentically themselves.

Rick thrives, working with individuals, and those in their inner circle, as they embark on the journey out of the closet and beyond. He specializes in helping people build confidence, live their passion while loving their work, and live authentically. Authenticity isn't just a word he throws around lightly. It's the backbone of his practice and the manner in which he personnally strives to live each and every day of his own life.

Join Rick's Monthly "Guyz Like Us" Free Coaching Call For Gay Men!

Connect with Rick through his Coming Out & Life Coaching Newsletter.

Schedule A Discovery Session - Click Here

Twitter - @rickclemons
Facebook -The Gay Man's Life Coach & Rick The Coming Out Coach
You Tube Channel -The Gay Man's Life Coach & Coming Out Coach

Location: Riverside, CA
Credentials: ACC, CPC
Specialties: LGBT Issues (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender), Men's Issues, Sexuality
Other Articles/News by Rick Clemons:

6 Reasons I (Finally!) Married My Gay Partner Of 13 Years

By

Thirteen years is a long time to share a life with someone. I should know; I've now done it twice. Once with my ex-wife, and this time with my partner ... you know, the gay one. I know, it's not 25 or 50 years, but God willing, I'll at least get to 24 with my partner ... oh wait, make that: my husband! Yep, I got hitched and just in the nick ... Read more

Hey Straight Men, Be Honest: You’re Gay! (Or At Least Bisexual)

By

First, let me say—by no means am I the pot calling the kettle black. After all, I was once one of those "not gay" straight guys who enjoyed having ("seriously, I'm not gay") sex with other "not gay" straight guys (as well as a few fully "out" gay guys).  You see, there's a hidden epidemic, (well, ... Read more

Will I Be A Bad Gay Lover? 5 Fears About Coming Out

By

Call it a mid-life crisis or just finally coming to your senses. Either way, coming out late in life is confusing. Yes. We could have avoided all this had we walked the line of integrity and said, "I'm gay!" The only problem is that's so much easier said than done. In fact, I'm always amused at the number of people from all walks of ... Read more

See More

 
My Videos
ASK YOURTANGO MORE QUESTIONS
Must-see Videos
SEE MORE VIDEOS
Most Popular