Cocky vs. Confident...What's Gay got to do with it?

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Cocky vs. Confident...What's Gay got to do with it?
Flippant, snarky, quck to the quip or CONFIDENT? Are gay men really the masters at this thing?

Have you ever met a person that they moment they open their mouth you think, “What a cocky #@$%!”

  • Mr. Swagger with the "Hey babes," dropping like flies
  • The Gal with the chastity belt so tight that she reeks of Essence de' BITCH
  • And, of course the "I've got the answer for everything and you don't" person

Irritating, frustrating, and completely draining. Yet, on the other hand, might there just be a chance that these people are confident and not cocky assholes?


There is a difference. It’s a fine line, and when examined closely the subtle shift in perception is a confident person believes in themselves, honors the gifts they have to give as a person, and they see themselves as a unique piece of the puzzle that no one else in life can bring to this human experience. Their ego doesn’t get in the way of them being fully available and present to just be in this experience of life and share their beauty and talents.


The cocky person on the other hand sees themselves as the “it factor!” It’s all about their ego and their love fest with themselves. Sure they make room for others, provided those others build up the cocky persons ego, self-esteem and self-worth. There in lies the stereotypical judgment towards gay men. It's all about them, their fabulousness, and their snippy, snitty wit. Or is it? The other side of the argument would say that gay men (not all) are just uber confidant. Why?

 

  • They've fought the good fight to be noticed and appreciated. Fight or flight, doesn't matter. Truth is when you've had to fight to be who you are, and you turn that fight into positive, motivating energy, you can be confident in any situation.
     
  • Call it what you will - overkill or intense focus - gay men (not all) have an innate ability to go get what they want. Arguments have been made that it's because they have nothing better to do with their time than the pursuit of ass, mass, and living beyond their past. On the other side of the coin, what if it is just because they want to enjoy life and go for it?
Article contributed by

Rick Clemons

Author

Rick Clemons, The Gay Man's Life Coach & The Coming Out Coach

Rick is a straight-forward, compassionate, insightful, challenging, mentor, guide, and Certified Professional Coach who's been featured on The Ricki Lake Show, and is a highly sought after radio show personality, blogger, author, and faculty member of Sex Coach U. His loving, challenging, gentle, and inspiring approach ignites a fire in clients, helping them get through the darkest moments of life and come out the other side, kicking butt, and being authentically themselves.

Rick thrives, working with individuals, and those in their inner circle, as they embark on the journey out of the closet and beyond. He specializes in helping people build confidence, live their passion while loving their work, and live authentically. Authenticity isn't just a word he throws around lightly. It's the backbone of his practice and the manner in which he personnally strives to live each and every day of his own life.

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Location: Riverside, CA
Credentials: ACC, CPC
Specialties: LGBT Issues (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender), Men's Issues, Sexuality
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