Are You A Bully & Don't Even Know It?


Relationship Expert: Are You Bullying Your Family?
If your suggestions sound more like demands, you might be guilty.

One brave and fabulously honest mom, Rachel Macy Stafford, recently posted a piece on HuffPost Parents about bullying her daughter. How did she bully her? She had very high expectations and punished her — usually with harsh words or an angry tone of voice — when she didn't fulfill those expectations, or made mistakes, or did things that interfered with her schedule and responsibilities. As Stafford courageously and compassionately admits:

"I bully myself. And when I bully myself, it makes me unhappy and then I treat others badly."


Stafford's words ring true for so many of us, whether or not we have kids. Our relationship with ourselves — specifically, our bad relationship habits, like self-criticism and judgment, or our issues with self-trust — not only impact, but often define our relationships with others. To break it down: If we bully ourselves, chances are we also bully those we love, like our spouses and kids.

Given that we sometimes model bullying for our children (however accidentally), how can we readjust our attitudes and prevent them doing it to others, or from staying silent if they get bullied? Keep reading...


Here are 4 suggestions to stop the bullying cycle in our homes:

Article contributed by

Rhona Berens

Relationship Coach

Rhona Berens, PhD, CPCC
Parent Alliance® 
Helping Parents Stay Sane and Stay Together


Location: Los Angeles & Northern California, CA
Credentials: ACC, CPCC, PhD
Specialties: Communication Problems, Couples/Marital Issues, Life Transitions
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