On my first date with Alan, he suggested we order octopus. I laughed and said, "You'd be on your own with that!" And throughout the relationship I had to hear quips and comments about my healthy, green, almost-vegan food preferences.
"I would have never asked you out if I saw your eating habits listed as mostly vegan in your online dating profile." Great. Thanks for letting me know. Should we break up now?
If Alan and I ordered take-out, he'd choose to eat vegetarian so we could share. If we had plans for dinner, he'd always suggest a place that was very vegetarian-friendly. And while I appreciated the thought, none of this was necessary.
I would have preferred that he just be himself, and order whatever he liked. He even said, "Now, whenever I see a menu, I first scan it to see if there's anything you'll like, before I even look for myself." That makes you a thoughtful and considerate man, Alan. Hardly a horrible trait.
It wasn't long before he broke things off, citing my food choices as his main reason. "You eat too healthy. I want my kids to be comfortable eating anything. I don't want them to have food issues. I want them to eat at Per Se and at McDonald's."
As if I am destined to have problem children. As if we had ever even talked about having children! It didn't matter, though. To me, this all sounded like, "Blah blah blah I want my kids to eat at McDonald's," and I stopped listening.
In an attempt to further defend his position, he continued, "We wouldn't be able to have filet of beef for Christmas, or go to my favorite barbecue restaurant." What? Now he was making things up. And now I would really stop listening.
We never spoke about what I would or wouldn't cook. We never spoke about what I'd want cooked in any kitchen I shared. We never spoke about which restaurants I would enjoy. Continue reading.
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