"Often people attempt to live their lives backwards; they try to have more things, or more money, in order to do more of what they want, so they will be happier. The way it actually works is the reverse. In order to have what you want, you must first be who you really are, then do what you need to do."
–Margaret Young, paraphrased
"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves."
- Carl Jung
About Christine Carter
Hello, I'm Dr. Christine Carter, and I'm glad you've found me here.
I primarily write about raising happy children and about being a happier parent. Here's the thing: one key way to do both of these things is to be in a fullfilling and happy relationship. My favorite way to teach people to be happier in their relationships is through my online class, Raising Happiness, where people from all over the world are learning fun, practical, and science-based happiness skills. Perhaps you've seen my book, Raising Happiness: 10 Simple Steps for More Joyful Kids and Happier Parents, or something I've written for Greater Good, Huffington Post or PsychologyToday.com. If you want to learn more about me, check out this video from the Rachel Ray Morning Show.
I’m a sociologist and happiness expert at UC Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center, where I write the blog Raising Happiness. Since I’m reading all the research related to creating happy and sustainable relationships anyway, I thought I might as well make it useable to parents--whether they are single or married, gay or straight, young or old. My intention is to bring a scientific framing (what does the research actually say?) to our opinion-based parenting debates and advice. Should we stay together for the kids? How can we find balance and romance in the midst of our hectic family life? Is there such thing as separate but intimate? How much sex is enough? As a working parent myself, I know just how hard it can be to raise kids AND maintain a fulfilling love life.
My work is truly the intersection of my brain and my heart: my intellectual training in the social sciences and my very real, sometimes raw, experiences as a mother. I was married to my children's father for 10 years; we divorced in 2008, and now I am in another committed relationship with a man who has two children from his first marriage. Through all of this, I have learned a lot about the science of great romantic relationships. At the foundation of my work is this truth: our romantic relationships matter for the happiness of our children. When our love life is fulfilling and solid, our children can more easily thrive. Unfortunately, the reverse is also true: stress and unhappiness in our romantic relationships usually trickle down directly to our children.
There are happiness skills that we can practice ourselves, in our romantic relationships, and with our children that will help us all lead good, meaningful, happy lives. I'm so glad that you are joining me on this journey, and I hope that you find it as rewarding and wonderful as I do.
May you be happy!
Sign ups for the fall classes are now open! Use the code "yourtango" to receive $25 off the cost of any class.