The 4 Best Holiday Gifts My Ex Ever Gave Me

3. Connection. I developed amazing, meaningful and deep connections with friends who came to support me through my breakup.

4. A recovery system. Most importantly, I created my effective breakup recovery system, which I now teach to my clients, that helps men and women get over their breakups and begin feeling empowered and hopeful, ready once and for all to create a new life they love.

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So that's what my ex — ahem, Santa Claus — gave me. Basically, the wonderful, vibrant and abundant life I'm leading today happened because of our breakup. Imagine that.

Now it's your turn. Really look at your relationship and challenge yourself to focus on what you have gained. Think about everything. Your might have gained something material, like a house, or something emotional, like stronger confidence. As the result of your breakup or divorce did you gain money, friendships, a new career or something else?

Also think about how your perspective has changed. How have you grown from this experience? What do you know now that you didn't know then? How are you worlds wiser today than you were only yesterday?

Think about all of those questions today. Write about them in your journal if you need to. Spend some time with this exercise and really push yourself to see what your Santa Claus gave you, and what unexpected gifts you can be grateful for this holiday season.

If you feel like sharing your thoughts with me and get some instant feedback and support go to my Facebook page and share your findings. I'd love to hear from you.

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To your new perspective!