3 Reasons Not To Keep Secrets In A Relationship
By Rachel Moheban. Posted on .
All little girls grow up whispering secrets to their trusted girlfriends. Sharing secrets with friends is an integral part growing up and developing trust. Nothing changes as an adult except that, as everything does, it becomes a little more complex than simply whispering exciting little secrets to a friend. Secrets in the adult world often imply a certain level of "shadiness", leaving an impression of "having something to hide" or "sweeping things under the rug." And in a relationship, keeping secrets from your partner is a definite no-no.
Nothing is more counter-productive to growing an open and honest relationship than keeping secrets from each other. Not to say that couples aren’t allowed some level of privacy, however, sharing and communicating honestly is the best and only way to build a healthy relationship. Thinking, "What she doesn’t know can’t hurt her" or "What’s one little white lie?" is definitely not the way to achieve this.
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If all this is not convincing enough to stay away from bending the truth, here are the top 3 reasons why not to keep secrets in your relationship:
1. Secrets always have a way of getting out – secrets tend not to stay, well, secret for very long. This isn’t an age-old saying for nothing – it’s a tried and tested fact of life.
2. Secrets breed more (even bigger) secrets – secrets have an uncanny ability to multiply at a very rapid pace and before you know it, you and your partner may find your relationship drowning in a sea of secrets.
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3. Tit for tat – once your secret has been found out (see point 1) your partner may very well start to keep secrets of his/her own which brings you right back to point 2. Break the vicious cycle of untruths in your relationship and work towards being completely open and honest with your partner.
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