New To BDSM? Here's Your 10 Step Guide To Getting Started!

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New To BDSM? Here's Your 10 Step Guide To Getting Started!
Get kinky with your partner and try something new and exciting.

7. Check in after your adventure.
Bask in the afterglow and then take the time to check in with one another about how your explorations went. Sometimes it makes sense to check in a few hours after, other times it can wait until the next day. Be sure to ask our favorite question: "What could have made it even better?" This question allows for the kind of feedback that will allow you to have more satisfying sex every time. Acknowledge that you are both new to BDSM (at least with each other) and both have a lot to learn. Use feedback to get to know one another’s needs and desires so you can have even more satisfying exchanges in the future!

8. Watch and learn.
If you are new to BDSM, it can be very enlightening to attend a BDSM conference or play party and simply watch other people play. You’ll get your mind blown open to the possibilities and if you pay attention to what turns you on, you can learn a lot about yourself. Many BDSM conferences have workshops where you can learn new skills in a safe environment.

9. Never say never.
Explore slowly at first, but keep your options open. A lot of BDSM activities look way more intense than they feel. Piercing, for example, is something a lot of people are scared of, but can actually feel really relaxing and not at all painful! Keep an open mind, explore one thing at a time and never say never!

10. Enjoy the journey.
It is easy to get overwhelmed when you are new to BDSM. Understand it as a long-term exploration of your sexuality and desires and enjoy each step of the way. Sexuality is a fluid force in our lives: we need different things at different phases and the process of discovering yourself as a sexual being never ends! Especially in long term relationships, the spirit of curiosity and exploration can go a long way towards keeping your sex life exciting and fulfilling.

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