'I want sex to last longer.'

By Pam Babbitt. Posted on Oct 8th 2010.

HIM – ‘I want sex to last longer. I want to get a rock hard erection that lasts a LONG time so I can thrust forever and drive her wild.’

HER – ‘I want sex to last longer. I want to snuggle for a bit first. Then slowly undress each other. Wait. Not yet. First I would like him to caress me through my clothes. That feeling of fabric between us is a huge turn on for me. Now the slow undressing, with him kissing my body all over. And lots of slow, light, sensual touch (but not sexual … yet) – with some toys – like a feather tickling me or some soft fur caressing my entire backside, or that dry body brush that scratches just right.

More from YourTango: Are you a 'default woman'?

Then I want to tantalize him and use that feather to tickle him in all the right places. Then I’ll stop and ask him to tell me exactly what he wants – in detail. I want things to heat up gradually until we are really sizzling, then let the arousal level go down, then build it up again, and again… I’d like him to look at me – into my eyes, so I can really feel his presence. I want to feel connected, and be playful, with no goals. I want to snuggle afterwards. A little talk would be nice.’

Aren’t gender differences fascinating?

More from YourTango: Got sexuality?

I’ve spoken in generalities here and there are always exceptions. It is not my intention to offend anyone or to suggest that either gender is right or wrong. It IS my intention to bring these differences to light, and to encourage communication and understanding.

How about initiating a conversation with your lover? Share a laugh over this blog and then detail some of your own desires!

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Pam Babbitt

Sex CoachPam Babbitt, S.I. Sex & Relationship Coach http://www.SexCoaching.com 888.719.7119

Location: Boulder, CO

Credentials: Other

Specialties: Couples/Marital Issues, Dating/Being Single Support

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